


In My Head

by Hormonal_Trashbag



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Crack, F/M, Force Bond (Star Wars), Inappropriate Use of the Force, Slow Burn, Smut, someone needs to teach Ren how to flirt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-08
Updated: 2016-04-01
Packaged: 2018-05-19 04:29:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 28,541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5953624
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hormonal_Trashbag/pseuds/Hormonal_Trashbag
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kylo Ren comes to the conclusion that what had sealed the fate of his grandfather, had fully turned him over to the dark side must have been doing the do. For Rey, this only means badly timed attempts at seduction from the man who’s supposed to be her nemesis.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Establishing Communications

The first time it happens, it’s nothing more than a voice in her head, a whisper from invisible lips hovering over the shell of her ear. It could have been a passing thought, really.

_Kylo Ren is pretty good looking for someone on the enemy’s side._

While she had been meditating under Master Luke’s orders, that idea catapulted her from the inner peace she had established and then she was lying with her back flat on green grass, eyes wide. She was thankful to be alone as she regained control of herself.

She was meditating once more, almost a week later, when the voice returned. Again, it was nothing more than a sigh into the short, sensitive hairs that grew at the back of her neck, but it managed to make them stand on end.

_I think I might be attracted to him._

Unfortunately, unlike last time, she was sitting cross-legged a few feet from Master Luke, and so when she made an indignant squeak, he glanced over at her, concerned. Her gaze was tumultuous when it met his, but she managed to keep from saying something inappropriate.

“Forgive me, Master,” she stuttered. “I became distracted.”

He nodded his head, _too_ understanding. “I know it can be difficult at first, Rey. Try to concentrate again.”

His eyes shut once more, and she tried to follow his example. She sensed him emptying his mind beside her, but she was too busy sorting out her brain to clear it.

It took her a few minutes, before she realized she knew that voice. It had been settling itself in the rear of her head since she battled with Kylo Ren, and she had never put too much thought into it. She had assumed, perhaps in a moment of naivety, that it had been the force awakening within her. It had sat there quietly in its nest, and she had been given no reason to worry.

Now, a much more disturbing notion burdened her mind. It wasn’t the force, camping out in her head, but Kylo Ren instead.

At this realization, she only had to question: why the hell would her enemy be trying to plant thoughts of attraction for him in her head?

* * *

He waited a few weeks this time before returning, and in the time since she had heard his voice, she had presumed he would give up his ploy--whatever it was--since she already knew it was him.

She was wrong.

_Scavenger. Listen to the sound of my voice..._

Rey physically shook her head, a frown forming on her face. It was late into the night, and she was sitting up on her sleep mat, spending the last few moments of her day in deep thought.

_Go away,_ she snarled back, before adding resentfully, _and you should know my name by now._

He chuckled softly in her head, seemingly amused.

_Do you want me to say your name,_ Rey? _I can, over and over again, as many times as you need me to, as I--_

_Stop that!_

Embarrassing as it was, Rey felt herself flush red. Confusion overwhelmed her, and she decided that all she needed from him was to get out of her head. She did all she could to shut him out, but his voice only crooned at her from behind a poorly formed barrier.

_I can see what you really feel, Rey. I know you don’t want me to stop. There’s no need to be ashamed--_

_Knock it off!_

A feeling of mirth drenched her entire being, a tangible weight on her shoulders, and it occurred to her that wherever Kylo Ren was, he was laughing. Out loud.

Her displeasure at this suspicion gave her the concentration she required to slam the connection shut, and silence replaced the image of Kylo Ren, cloaked in black, doubling over with cackles at her expense.

* * *

She was at a humble dinner of self-grown vegetables and earthy bread, courtesy of Master Luke, when Kylo Ren decided to test the waters once more. He must have spent time mentally preparing himself to interrupt her meal, because this time, her vision is suddenly flooded by an image he projected.

She was on what Rey could only assume was Kylo Ren’s bed, wearing no more than her undergarments. His unmasked face was at her ankles, his generous lips pressed to her skin and only traveling upward over smooth calves. She was so stunned, she could only watch as he opened his mouth the lave the skin behind her knee. As he reached the silken flesh of her thigh, she mentally froze, wondering why she was letting him subject her to such a lascivious vision.

She interrupted him before he could get any further. _My legs don’t look like that. I’ve been training to be a Jedi on a planet that lacks basic amenities, stupid._

It was clear that he hadn’t anticipated her butting in, because he replied with a clueless, flustered tone.

_What?_

In an impulsive moment, she took advantage of his lowered guard, manipulating his image so that instead of smooth, tanned skin, he was kissing Wookie legs.

Repulsed, he was out of her head so quickly that Rey barked a laugh.

Master Luke cleared his throat beside her in what might have been a snicker. She had the good sense to be mortified that he must have seen Kylo Ren’s invasive vision as well, but he patted her shoulder.

“I apologize, it seems no one was able to teach my nephew tact,” he said.

Master Luke’s expression was transparent, but she saw unfamiliar humor dancing in his light eyes. It only lasted a few seconds, before he returned to his own dinner, looking as severe and enlightened as ever.

She sighed, a little guilty. She should ignore Kylo Ren, Rey knew. She would attempt to act more like an upstanding Jedi, she decided.


	2. Persistence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> General Hux wants nothing to do with Kylo Ren and his current dilemma.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter features winemom!Hux in all his glory. Enjoy~

Kylo Ren paced the length of his quarters in long strides. He quickly learned, to his frustration, that his height did not make it easy for him to march quite as much as he needed to. So, he had no choice to don his helmet and transition to pacing the halls. The conflict he felt could not be soothed so easily, however, and he considered consulting his grandfather.

He, surely, would understand his current confusion.

Struggling, he started back to his quarters, only to be stopped by a rather put-out General Hux.

“What are you doing?” Hux snapped, eyes narrowed in anger. “You’ve put the troops completely on edge with your silly boot stomping.”

Usually, it was effortless to feel his rage build at merely seeing Hux. Yet, he felt himself deflate instead. He must have truly been desperate, to turn to the likes of Hux for any sort of advice. To even think Hux capable of advisement. Kylo straightened his back, uncomfortable with the position he now found himself in.

“General,” he greeted, his voice sounding only more gruff through the voice apparatus in his mask. Kylo took a deep, calming breath before uttering through grit teeth. “I require your council on a matter of great importance.”

Hux was taken aback, and it showed on his face. “What could I _possibly_ give you council on? Go to Supreme Leader Snoke if you want to discuss religion.”

The snark in Hux’s tone was not lost on Kylo. His jaw tightened from behind his metallic facade.

“What I wish to speak about is...” Kylo momentarily hesitated, before huffing. “It is of a different nature.”

Hux gave him a long look over, and could observe the tension that wracked the entire, dark length of him. Kylo was too distraught by his hopeless situation to be embarrassed by the General’s amused pity.

At last, Hux sighed. “I need a glass of wine for this.”

* * *

Now within his own quarters, Hux reclined on a leather armchair, legs crossed, a glass of much needed merlot swirling in his hand. For a solid five minutes, he watched Kylo anxiously pace the room. He grimaced into the wine that he should have been allowed to enjoy, if not for the long streak of angst trying to wear down his flooring with each step.

He didn’t bother to hide his impatience. “If you don’t start talking, I’m going to kick you out.”

Kylo paused at this declaration, nodding his head absentmindedly before continuing to stride back and forth.

Well, Hux supposed, no one could say he didn’t try. He lifted his wineglass back to his lips.

“She has _really_ hairy legs.” Kylo finally uttered.

Hux promptly choked. Scandalized, he forced himself to swallow before coughing.

“Excuse me?”

Kylo sent him a flat look that even Hux could read through the mask.

“The scavenger girl-- _Rey,”_ he corrected himself. “She has really hairy legs.”

Hux was silent. He set aside his wine, _so much for enjoying a perfectly good glass,_ and shook his ginger hair with clawed fingers to the point of disorder. Still, Kylo was staring at him with a blank look, filled with expectation.

“Why,” he started slowly, “do you care about the scavenger’s--”

“Rey,” Kylo repeated for him. As if Hux would have forgotten that Kylo was apparently calling her by name.

“Why do you care about her legs?” he asked again, pointedly ignoring Kylo’s interruption.

His tone was level in his response. “I’m trying to fuck her.”

Hux gazed at this supposed force to be reckoned with, unable to form a single thought. Kylo shifted slightly under the weight of his stare, waiting for him to say more. To actually give him advice on how to... _bed_ that desert rat. Hux did not get paid nearly enough to put up with this walking disaster, he decided as he grabbed his wineglass once more, downing its contents all at once.

He suddenly had too many questions to ask. Why the interest in a scavenger? How did Kylo actually plan to go about sneaking around the Resistance to get into her pants? How did he even know the state of her legs? What sort of communications did they have set up? What was _she_ thinking?

Yet, he could only voice the most pressing in his mind. “And somehow, you thought _I_ was a good person to ask help from?”

Hux was pretty sure he should be offended.

Again, with the empty stare from behind that stupid mask.

“I assumed you had unique tastes,” Kylo replied, unbothered.

Hux unhitched his legs and stood, quickly crossing the room to retrieve his merlot. He took a long swig directly from the bottle, struggling to keep his composure intact.

“I have perfectly normal tastes, thank you very much,” he growled. “I’m not helping you get laid, so go figure it out yourself.”

Somehow, Hux knew that he was pouting from underneath his mask. Despite that, Kylo retreated rather gracefully, and alone in his quarters, Hux lifted the bottle in a silent toast, before taking another drink.  _Fuck you._

When he turned prematurely grey, he was going to blame Kylo Ren.

* * *

Rey had been so hopeful. She had maintained silence in her head for a good six weeks, and was so pleased with herself, for so cleverly putting an end to Kylo Ren’s pursuit. Her training had progressed well, according to Master Luke, and meditation was marginally easier.

She felt her frustration--downright _fury--_ was completely justified when he decided, utterly out of the blue, to continue his wooing.

_I decided I don’t care if you have Wookie legs._

Rey, who had been balanced in a headstand, toppled over at the interruption. She scowled, rubbing her back.

_Well, I care that you’re an insufferable jerk. Go away._

The sudden sensation of large, warm fingers trailing down the pale underside of her arm shocked her into sitting upright. The invisible hand took hers, lacing their fingers together. She didn’t even want to know how he figured out this new trick, she just wanted her heart to stop pounding so hard.

 _Rey,_ his voice was choked with longing, _I’m not going to do that._

She just about screamed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still not apologizing. Let me know what you think! :)


	3. Murder Accusations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo Ren just doesn't know when to stop. Rey is fed up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow. My life is nonsense.

It had been a long day. Rey flopped herself down onto her mat face-first, smothering herself with her own pillow. She had to resist the urge to cry--or shriek, she wasn’t quite sure which she wanted to do more--and instead whimpered into the silence of her small room.

Another bout of pain rolled in her lower-abdomen, and she squirmed at the unpleasant sensation. She knew that no position she threw herself into would give her relief, but she tossed herself onto her side, curling into a compact ball.

The exercise of her training helped, but the first day was always the worst. If the cramps weren’t bad enough, she felt uncomfortably bloated. She closed her eyes and breathed out her nose, though it was impossible to completely ignore the feeling of bodily displacement.

If she couldn’t fall asleep later, she would have to make a hot water bottle for herself, Rey supposed.

She hated that she and Kylo Ren had a strange connection. She hated even more that he was paying closer attention to it by the day. He must have sensed her discomfort, because there he was again, intruding her thoughts with an inappropriately concerned tone.

_Rey, what is this pain I feel--_

She didn’t even let him finish. _No._

_What do you mean, ‘no?’_

Rey glared into empty space. _It means no. No, no, no. Not now, not ever. Get your stupid voice out of my head, or I won’t be responsible for my actions._

Usually she didn’t have so much to say. She wouldn’t bother with him, and simply shut him out before he can become a true nuisance. Of course, this is the first time he’s managed to catch her while she was menstruating, a miracle in and of itself.

She hopes that he will take a hint, in light of her not-so-subtle threat. If she was honest with herself, Rey wasn’t even sure what she was going to do to him. Just that it would be unpleasant.

 _Wait a second,_ he barked back, surprising her. _Be fair. I sensed your anguish and wanted to help!_

 _Help?_ she repeated, flabbergasted by his audacity. _Help this!_

It took her a second to gather herself. She tried his sweet, little hand-holding through the force trick, instead projecting a coiling pang of pain to his insides. Through their connection, she felt his startled gasp, and grinned devilishly to herself. Served him right.

 _What_ was _that?_ he asked in panic, and she laughed out loud. _What did you just do to me? Murder attempts are completely uncalled for, Rey--_

Sending another shock his way, she wondered if she could make him cry. She was feeling a bit vengeful.

_It isn’t murder, you jackass. It’s having a uterus, and I think it’s totally called for._

There was a pause as he processed her response. Pleased for a few moments, Rey concluded that he must have run away scared. Unfortunately, he didn’t scare off so easily this time.

He returned with a roar.

 _You decided to give me period cramps because I was worried about you? I thought you were supposed to be the_ nice _one in this relationship! I would never make you feel being kicked in the balls!_

 _This isn’t a relationship!_ she rebuked roughly. _And being kicked in the balls is completely different! Why do men think they can just mention being kicked in the balls and think ‘oh, I know what she’s going through,’ huh?_

She snorted when he sidestepped her accusation.

_What? Of course this is a relationship! Would you talk about your uterus with a man that you weren’t in a relationship with?_

Rey blinked, surprised by his claim.

_I wouldn’t be talking to you about it if you weren’t lurking in my head, creep!_

Offended by the name-calling, he didn’t have the chance to add more before she continued.

 _For that, I hope someone kicks you in the balls! Hell, I’ll pay someone to, with a big,_ fat _kiss._

With that, she abruptly shut him off, chest heaving. It was a shame she already knew that wasn’t enough to keep him out of her head forever.

A few nights later, he returned with a simple _I’m sorry._

She had been lying in bed, restless, and his fingers, cool to the touch, nervously stroked her hair. Then he was gone again, without her saying a word.

Rey would die before admitting, to him least of all, that the gesture felt oddly nice.

* * *

_Tell me about yourself,_ he said one afternoon. Though still an annoyance, he had gotten better at contacting her outside her long hours of training.

Rey was tired, in the middle of stretching. She gave a mental shrug.

_You’ve already been inside my head. What more do you need to know?_

His tone was flippant. _I didn’t really go through that much._

Her answering laugh is humorless.

 _No, really,_ he urges, _tell me. I want to know you better._

Rey sighs, rolling her shoulders. Master Luke is meditating nearby, and she felt somewhat ashamed to be letting Kylo Ren egg a conversation out of her in his presence. She had to tell herself that she’s just trying to get rid of him. Maybe if she answered, it would end sooner.

 _Well,_ she grumbled, _I’m an amazing, beautiful woman who--_

 _I already know that much,_ he cut her off, seemingly unembarrassed.

She pursed her lips, ignoring the sudden warmth that flooded her cheeks. It was best, she decided, that she blamed the grueling exercise.

 _I’m a scavenger from Jakku,_ she finally managed. _There isn’t much more to know about me._

His voice adapts a certain smoothness that she’s never heard before. _I’m sure that isn’t true, Rey._

She had to push down the sudden desire to dive headfirst into the sea. Her entire face was on fire, and she wasn’t sure how to explain it to herself. She couldn’t.

 _Are you embarrassed?_ he finally asked, when she was quiet for too long.

She picked up on his amused self-satisfaction, and she was able to find her irritation once more. It came as a comfort, that the strange moment passed so quickly.

 _Of course not!_ she snapped. _Can you blame me for not sharing my deepest, darkest secrets with my enemy?_

If he was put off by her bristly attitude, she didn’t give herself the opportunity to find out. She didn’t want to know.

 _I don’t want to talk to you,_ she muttered.

Rey shoved him out by force.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kylo might have found himself someone who'll help him with his flirting...


	4. An Unexpected Guest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Help comes to Kylo Ren from an unexpected place, and he is in no position to turn it down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few people tried to guess who shows up to teach Kylo Ren how to flirt. Admittedly, I did consider Anakin for this role, but... that's a bit too predictable. Plus, I feel my choice is a little more fun.

Obi-Wan had started watching Ben Solo from early on in his life. He had told himself that he needed to stop intervening in the lives of Skywalkers. He was but a lingering ghost in the force, and he couldn’t spend all of eternity cleaning up their messes. If he did, they would never learn to do it themselves.

While it had saddened him to watch Ben descend into darkness, manipulated by the whispered promises of Snoke, he stood his ground. Obi-Wan would _not_ interfere.

But then he saw this Kylo Ren, as he now called himself, form an unlikely connection with the young woman from Jakku, and Obi-Wan sensed the potential for redemption. It would be nice to see a Skywalker clean up their act for once. Yet, he hesitated. He knew Ben worshiped the grandfather he had never had the opportunity to meet. Perhaps, then, a way to reach young Ben could be discovered through Anakin.

Obi-Wan implored him, but Anakin would not budge. He simply refused to have anything to do with Ben, claiming that _he_ had hooked up with an amazingly clever senator all on his own. Obi-Wan suspected that his resistance had more to do with the fact Anakin’s grandson was foolishly following in his footsteps, repeating each mistake he had made. Admittedly, it must have been a slap in the face.

All Obi-Wan wanted was to see Ben return to the light, where he clearly belonged.

After watching for a few months as Ben struggled to charm the pretty Jedi-in-training, _Rey,_ he realized that if he wanted a job done, he would have to do it himself.

* * *

“You need help,” a voice startled him out of his reverie.

Kylo whipped his head around in its direction, long, curling locks of black hair lashing at his cheeks. No one should have been able to enter his quarters without the proper clearance, and he intended to give the intruder a beating for his trouble.

He was greeted not by a soon-to-be bloodied First Order hand, but by someone who was already dead, and not because of his own doing. The specter was an elderly man with a white beard, a Jedi, if his long robes were anything to go by. Kylo gave the stranger a long look-over before scoffing.

“The last thing I need is help from a Jedi.”

The spirit seemed amused by this. There was a twinkle in his eye. “Oh, I’m not sure I agree with that, my young padawan.”

Kylo clenched his jaw tight, glaring at the apparition through his brow. “I’m no padawan, old man. I am the master of the Knights of Ren, and--”

“Oh, so you completed your training under Master Luke, then? I don’t remember seeing that.”

He snarled, unable to find a proper response. Kylo tried to sense the force around his unexpected visitor, resolved to manipulate him into leaving. He had no such luck, it seemed, because the old man laughed, removing his hood.

“That isn’t why I’m here, young Ben. You can relax.”

Kylo was caught between asking how the visitor knew his birth-name and telling him that he no longer went by Ben. The old man grasped at his confusion, and decided to clear the air.

“Well, if you must know, I felt it was only right to keep an eye on the boy named after me. Really, if you’re going to be Ben, you need to live up to the name a bit more.”

Kylo slowly exhaled, bringing a hand up to rub the bridge of his nose. It did very little to relieve his stress.

“You’re Obi-Wan,” he stated, doubtful. Though he had all the appearances of a Jedi, he did not seem like much. “I don’t need a crusty, old man telling me I lack charm. Go haunt someone else.”

Obi-Wan blinked for a moment, surprised. “I see,” he murmured, his tone thoughtful. “In that case...”

Obi-Wan’s ghost flickered in and out of existence, and Kylo hoped that meant the nuisance was gone. That was not the case. The frail, old man was replaced by one decades younger, perhaps only fifteen years older than himself. Obi-Wan straightened his back with a small smirk, laughter lines creasing at the corners of his warm eyes.

Kylo scowled, still opposed to the idea of being taught _how to flirt_ by some emotionally repressed Jedi that undoubtedly never got laid in his life. If anything, his grandfather’s guidance would be helpful. He was the one who had married. Surely he must have been watching him as well, if the likes of Obi-Wan was.

“I was actually quite charming, in my youth,” the ghost flashed a toothy grin. “And just because I had the restraint of a proper Jedi doesn’t mean I was incapable of wooing.”

Kylo considered his words, as well as his own dire situation. It did not take an expert to know that he did need help, desperately. He wondered what the consequences would be, should Snoke learn that he accepted the assistance of a Jedi.

Still, Hux had been useless. Asking Snoke’s advice was out of the question, especially when taking into account just how long he had been communicating with Rey without asking a word about her location or trying to tempt her with the powers of the dark side. At the moment, his options were nonexistent. Rey was still pushing him away with every attempt he made to pursue her. It would be insanity to continue without some sort of change.

At length, he sighed. “Tell me what you would have me do, then.”

Obi-Wan’s grin widened with his success. “What do you already know about her?”

Not that much, Kylo realized. His voice betrayed his own bemusement. “She’s from Jakku.”

Obi-Wan stroked his beard, pursing his lips. “That’s it? You don’t know anything else about her?”

Kylo felt helpless. “She’s strong with the force?”

By the look he gave him, that wasn’t quite what Obi-Wan was looking for.

“Okay. Obviously, we need to start with the very basics,” Obi-Wan crossed his arms. “You’re going to ask her about herself.”

Kylo felt a sudden sense of dread. He swallowed thickly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, and as always, kudos and comments are greatly appreciated!


	5. Youth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey is forced to sit through some unwanted advice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oops I did it again. More stupid humor. Enjoy...?

_Come on, Rey, just tell me._

His voice was insistent, and despite her reservations, she cracked a small smile as she shook her head.

_No! Why do you want to know, Kylo?_

She isn’t quite sure why his name comes so naturally to her, but it does. That should bother her.

 _I just do,_ he replied.

Rey swore his voice sounded lighter now than it was when he first tested the waters with her. She wasn’t sure what that meant, and part of her was afraid to properly analyze his change of tone. She shouldn’t be letting him bug her at all.

 _Fine,_ she groans, and it’s a long, drawn-out sound meant to show her annoyance. Still, she gave into him. _I really like flowers. When I was little, I tried a bit of gardening in the shade of my AT-AT, which obviously didn’t work, seeing as Jakku is a literally ball of dry sand._

His voice is a gentle hum. _Flowers, huh?_

Her grin is full-blown. _Yes,_ flowers! _Don’t make fun of me--_

 _I’m not,_ he swore.

Before she could retort, she was blinded by a filter of verdant leaves and silken petals, flickering over her vision. A few she recognized, but as each bloom became more vibrant and exotic, she lost track of all she knew and was fully absorbed by what he showed her. A sudden aroma of sweetly scented flora tickled her nose, and for a moment she was amazed, that he even knew of so many flowers. That so many existed for him to know about.

She sighed, relaxing out of her meditative position, and let him sweep each image and fragrance over her senses.

 _I can tell you their names, if you want,_ Kylo murmured, and it was not the first time in the past few weeks that it occurred to Rey that he had become astonishingly smooth.

Yet, she could not fully quell her desire to hear him identify each bloom for her, his voice scarcely a whisper. What was worse than that, was that he knew as much.

Though her eyes had been closed, her senses shut off to everything but what he illustrated in her mind, they shot open at the sound of Master Luke clearing his throat. She swiftly severed the connection to Kylo Ren, offering him no explanation before doing so.

“Rey, I think we need to have a talk,” Master Luke pronounced, his voice guarded.

She felt the approach of an oncoming scolding, and she bit her lower lip, swaddled with guilt. Still, she was mature enough to straighten her back, throw back her shoulders, and meet his gaze when he sat beside her.

“I know that Ben--” he shook his head with a grimace, before correcting himself, _“--Kylo Ren_ has continued to communicate with you. He’s become quite good at it, in fact.”

Rey knew there was no sense in denying the truth. Slowly, she nodded her head.

“I feel it’s necessary to warn you of the dangers you might face...when dealing with him.”

Rey gives a small huff. “I know, Master. I shouldn’t let him try to seduce me with the powers of the dark side.”

For a moment, he looked uncomfortable, and she couldn’t pinpoint why. “Well yes,” he continued, “but I know that I can’t expect you to heed my every word. While I upheld the Jedi tradition of remaining abstinent, times are different, and I can’t force you to follow my example.”

Rey was utterly horrified. “Master--”

He raised his hand, pleading silence. She pursed her lips. “As I said, I know you’ll end up doing what you want, no matter what I say about it. That is what it means to be in your youth, and while I may not condone it, I understand.”

“Please stop,” she begged, barely managing to breathe.

He cleared his throat again, his expression just as pained. “I couldn’t be sure of how much you knew, since you grew up alone on Jakku, but I can’t let you become... _intimate_ with someone without explaining how to be safe.”

“Wow, um, okay,” she stammered, “that is very unnecessary.”

“I disagree,” he countered, gaining momentum. “I know you want to tell me that it could never happen, but as your master, it is my duty to prepare you for whatever you might face.”

“That’s not what I mean--”

He whipped out a rather phallic-shaped squash from within his robes, his countenance completely serious as he handed it to her along with a small, foil square. She didn’t know how or why he had a condom, but she had no choice but to accept it.

“I doubt my nephew ever was taught a thing about protection, but as long as you’ve been educated, I can rest easy.”

Rey stared at him, stunned. Uncertain, she opened, then closed her mouth, words failing her. She knew her face was bright red, but whatever shame she might have felt in speaking with Kylo Ren was washed away with how wildly inappropriate Master Luke’s assumptions were.

Finally, she exhaled, her shoulders tense. “Master, I already know...about safe sex.”

He was both relieved and awkward all at once, though Rey doubted he could ever feel as humiliated as she did.

“Oh.”

“Yeah,” she replied.

“Right,” he inclined his head stiffly, getting back to his feet. “Well, maybe you could just,” he paused a moment, and the tension was thick, “practice, or something.”

He all but ran from where she sat, and Rey wished she could be swallowed up by the ocean roaring bellow her. She almost screamed after his disappearing back, _Practice what?_

Instead, she settled for grumbling at the only one she could hold responsible.

_This is all your fault, Kylo!_

It took him a moment to reply, and Rey was partly surprised he didn’t answer with his own yell. She wouldn't have called him resigned, but he was definitely not as volatile.

_What did I do now?_

_Master Luke just tried to give me a lecture on safe sex because of you!_

He couldn’t even form a proper thought, sending instead a stuttering sense of confusion. Not quite satisfied by his level of horror, she forced him to live through the experience himself, and even then, he could only reply with a string of unconnected words.

 _How--no--I_...squash... _practice?_

Without a single thing to say to him, Rey shoved him out once more.

* * *

Kylo Ren stared with wide eyes at a blank wall.

Obi-Wan’s tone adopted a humored reminiscence. “Ah, Luke. What an amazingly misguided and helpful feat of teaching. Rather sweet of him, really.”

“Please,” Kylo uttered, “be quiet for a moment.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, as always!


	6. Fear and Joy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey tried to blame her actions on the alcohol, but even she couldn't convince herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY! I'm not really doing anything for it (which is totally fine) but consider this my gift to all my lovely readers! You guys are so great, really. :)

Rey swirled her mug of grog. She stared down into it, a little too thoughtful for all the welcoming celebrations around her.

After a year of training on Ahch-To, she was back on a Resistance base, surrounded by excitable strangers. They were all amazed by the presence of a new Jedi, though she was certain they would have thrown Master Luke up in the air if he had deigned to join the festivities. She could more than understand his decision to spend the evening in a quiet peace with his twin sister.

It had taken a lot to convince him to return with her, but she could sense a small happiness from him. He was pleased to see General Organa again, and she could be happy for the siblings.

She was taken by surprise when a warm hand curled over her round shoulder, and when she jolted, a familiar laugh filled what small space she took up.

She grinned, turning into a hug. Finn. It had saddened her, when she returned to the base to find he had been sent away on a mission. Thankfully, he was back in one piece.

“I missed you,” he whispered into her shoulder, and she closed her eyes with a muted nod.

The seriousness lasted but a second, before he was rubbing the scruff of his cheek--which must have gone a few days without shaving--against her soft one. He laughed loudly, crowing out into the room as she, giggling, squirmed away from his scratching.

“Do you think I should shave, Rey?”

She took the opportunity to consider his face, and when he noticed her stare, he wriggled his eyebrows suggestively.

She slapped his chest, cackling. “No, you should grow you beard down to your chest. In fact, you should never shave again.”

He nodded sagely. “Yes, well, that might interfere with my _social_ agenda.”

She was unfortunately reminded of a certain soothing voice and she froze, remembering that she hadn’t heard it in her head in nearly a month. She loathed to admit it, even to herself, but she missed the sound of Kylo Ren’s lilting voice. He hadn’t always been so slick. In fact, he had been rather clumsy most of the time, but while it had initially been aggravating, she found herself endeared by even his attempts at charming her.

Rey was terrified of this, and can’t help but to remember one of his first messages. _I think I might be attracted to him._

She couldn’t be, she swore. She had so many reasons to utterly despise him.

Rey knew she was spiraling. In a desperate act to counter it, she finished her drink with a heavy gulp.

Finn’s grin faltered, and she wanted to apologize, but already he was taking the stool beside her, embarrassment seeping into his expression.

“Okay,” he started, “I probably shouldn’t have said that.”

“No, Finn--”

She had to stop herself. How could she possibly explain what she was feeling? It was so complicated, and telling someone about it out loud would only make matters worse. She knew that much.

Rey leaned over to kiss his cheek, her hand on his arm. “It’s fine.”

It probably wasn’t.

* * *

She was drunk and upset by the time she reached her newly assigned quarters. Finn had recovered with dignity, but she could tell he was dismayed by her rejection. If she could call it that. It still stung that Kylo Ren was ignoring her. Wasn’t that supposed to be her role? While she had no sympathy for him, she pitied herself.

A perfectly decent person expressed real interest in her, and all she could think about was someone dysfunctional at best. Annoyed, she threw herself onto her bunk, glaring at the low ceiling above her. This was all his fault.

 _Why do you always cause problems for me?_ She couldn’t fully hide her own despair.

He is thinking back at her in a heartbeat, and she sucked in sharply, surprised by his sudden appearance. She hated that it was a pleasant occurrence, to hear his voice once more.

_I haven’t done anything to you, Rey._

_Exactly!_ she snapped back at him.  _Nothing. Complete silence. What the hell are you trying to pull?_

His tone is affronted by her questioning, and she loved the familiarity of it. _Isn’t this what you wanted?_

It should have been. She had shoved him away so many times, so why did she care? Her chest tightened, and she tried to convince herself it was the alcohol.

_I don’t know! Yes, I guess. I wasn’t ready for this._

_This?_ he repeated back at her.

 _You being gone,_ she clarified. It was definitely the alcohol.

Kylo was careful with what he said next, as if hesitant to say anything at all. _Rey, I know you’ve returned from training. It’s better_...safer _this way._

Rey still wasn’t satisfied. _What does that matter? It’s not as if you have anything to lose. You’re the bad guy! No one is going to fault you for trying to seduce a girl, but me, everything will fall apart for me if I decide I like it._

 _I don’t see what your problem is!_ Kylo barked. _If you have everything to lose, why would you even want me lurking in your head?_

_I got used to it! I liked talking!_

It was nice. And that was a truth she could no longer deny.

 _You_ liked _talking to--_

 _Oh, shut up!_ she whined back at him. _Of course I liked it. Which is all your fault, by the way._

He huffed back at her, bemused. _Yes, I forgot. Everything is my fault. Naturally._

It is!

 _Fine,_ he grumbled. _I still don’t know what you want from me._

She didn’t know, either.

And then she _did_. Desire clouded her vision. Rey changed the subject.

_Why haven’t you ever tried to kiss me?_

Shocked, he fumbled to form a comprehensible response. _We’re a galaxy apart--_

She cut him off. _You could have, if you wanted to. You held my hand once, you made me smell flowers. You could have kissed me. What stopped--_

 _\--It’s not as if you wanted me to kiss you!_ he interrupted hotly.

_Stop being so selfless. I do. I want you to. I want you to kiss me right now._

Whatever reservations he might have felt disappeared instantly. The sensation of his mouth, lips full and parted, pressed to hers. His tongue, hot and moist as it curled around hers, felt much too real, and Rey had to remind herself that the were on completely different worlds. She gasped as an invisible hand ghosted over her ribs, not stopping until it reached her cheek.

He was relentless as he delved into her, deeper with every passing moment, and the scrape of his bared teeth drove her to madness. She was struck with a need for so much more.

 _I wish you were here,_ she couldn’t help but to think.

He couldn’t string together the right words to express how he felt about this, but she was suddenly overwhelmed by unadulterated joy that wasn’t her own. It shined right into her mind, startling them both.

This wasn’t what he wanted, or at least it shouldn't have been. He had been trying to satisfy his own lust, to climb further down into darkness, and now he was getting so much more than what he had asked for. He wasn’t supposed to feel more.

It terrified him.

He was gone in the next moment, leaving her very much alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, probably not nearly as funny as previous chapters. Sorry. But maybe force-bond kisses make it okay?


	7. Sibling Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leia learns more about her son than she wanted to.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a brother who is very close to my age. I hope we still bicker when I'm eighty.
> 
> Anyway, sorry for such a late update! I got used to posting almost every day, but I've been busy with a paper. Two of them, actually. In any case, I'm back.

Luke knew very well how heartbroken his sister was at her son’s absence. For all her strength, even a woman like Leia couldn’t always pretend that she was fine. Han was gone, and though she was running the Resistance quite successfully, he could sense her longing to see Ben again. He was a man now, and the last time she had looked upon her son’s face, it had still been that of a boy.

While he was hesitant to give her reason to hope that Ben could be returned to her, Luke knew better than anyone that there was always hope. He considered Rey, and her unusual connection with Ben. Even if he hadn’t been a Jedi, he could have recognized that they were gravitating toward each other at an alarming rate. It was possible Leia already picked up on Ben’s shadow, forever haunting Rey’s mind, sensitive as she was to the force.

Luke decided he could not keep her in the dark about this. Not when he sensed such a propensity for goodness and light in his nephew. He always had.

“Your son has bonded with Rey,” he started slowly. “They’ve been talking for quite some time, now.”

Leia, a woman who was as busy as her high ranked title implied, nodded into her hurried meal, barely able to look away from the reports on First Order activity in yet another system of the Outer Rim.

“I know,” she replied, sparing just a second to look him in the eye.

Luke was unsurprised. He almost cracked a smile. Almost.

“He’s trying to seduce her.”

That caught her attention. She set the reports down to give him a hard stare. “To the dark side?”

This time Luke can’t help the small grin that forms on his bearded face. She looked less than amused by the gesture.

“No,” he spoke carefully. “More like, into his bed.”

The mother is silent, lips pressed firmly together, unable to picture her son, still faceless to her, as an adult with desires. Luke can see it in her mind--her sweet, young boy, barely older than ten, pulling moves on Rey--and for the first time in years, he gave a genuine laugh.

She smacked his shoulder, and it felt like times long gone.

“Don’t make fun of me!” she snapped, looking years younger. “That’s my baby boy. I didn’t get the chance to see him grow up. He isn’t supposed to be chasing girls yet!”

He continued to laugh. “Consider yourself lucky you didn’t have to see that. He was horrible at puberty. Drooled at anything with legs. Would turn so red when he saw a pretty girl that his ears would burn.”

She sighed then, and though she had a faint smile on her face, he could sense her sadness. She should have been able to see her son go through his awkward phases of adolescent self-discovery, and he instantly regretted bringing it up. Luke brought a hand up to rest his palm on her shoulder.

“And Rey?” she asked at length. “How does she feel about him?”

Luke smirked. “She bullied him a bit in the beginning. He’s growing on her, though. I think Rey would be too ashamed to admit it, but she doesn’t seem to be pushing him out as much as she used to. He’s developed unorthodox techniques in order to romance her from afar through the force. I’d be impressed by his skill, if it were not for the reason he learned how to project the sensation of touch on another person.”

Leia grimaced. “Do I even want to know? I didn’t even get the chance to give him _the talk._ How does he know about touching?”

Luke snickered.

“Did you tell him?”

Luke raised both hands in surrender. “No, of course not. Jedi don’t _do_ that. I had every intention of giving him proper training. I’m still upset that I had to talk with Rey about using protection.”

“It’s that serious?”

He huffed, frowning. “Yeah. I don’t understand what’s wrong with this generation of Jedi. Neither of them can keep it in their pants.”

Leia leveled him with a flat stare. “Well, you _wouldn’t_ understand, would you?”

He scratched his beard absentmindedly, ignoring her jab. “Well, whatever. Either way, I just wanted you to know that Ben isn’t completely gone. No matter how hard Kylo Ren tries to mutilate himself, to cut out that growing part of him, he can’t do it.”

“She’s giving him reason to return home,” she murmured, expression clouded with thought.

“You could say that,” he grumbled, not hiding his disapproval. “We should be happy there’s _someone_ that inspires goodness in his life.”

“I am happy!” she barked, not appreciative of his tone. “Go get laid, you old man virgin.”

Luke cringed. “Leave me alone.”

* * *

Kylo Ren had gone back to pacing his room. He dared not leave his quarters, considering how Hux had acted the last time he marched the halls. He found himself at an impasse once more, and though Obi-Wan’s guidance had proved to be more than useful, he felt the long-dead Jedi’s opinion on his current dilemma would be somewhat biased.

“I am here to help you, you know,” said long-dead Jedi reminded him with a drawl, casually reclined on a black, leather armchair.

Kylo’s eye twitched with annoyance. He paused for a moment. “You aren’t exactly a neutral person. I can’t trust your opinion if it isn’t objective.”

“Fine,” he exhaled, tone somewhat dramatic. “Just pretend I’m not listening. I’m not here.”

Kylo growled under his breath, glaring at the ever-present ghost. “Whatever.”

He decided to do as Obi-Wan suggested. And it was completely his decision to do so.

“She’s returned to the Resistance, and I’m not sure what I’m supposed to do about it. We’ve always been enemies, but when she was training with Uncle Luke, it was easier to ignore that.”

He didn’t notice Obi-Wan’s snicker at _uncle_.

“I might have to fight her, but I don’t want to do that. And I don’t think she would, either. All I wanted was to sleep with her...I’m not supposed to have feelings for her.”

He turned his head to scowl at Obi-Wan. “This is your fault. You made me do all that affectionate crap.”

“I didn’t force you to do anything. I gave you _my_ advice, and it was up to you to follow it or not. Don’t blame me if she goes for tender romance instead of your indelicate, crass innuendos.”

Kylo hissed at his tone. “Are you suggesting that I give everything up for her? Abandon the First Order for Rey? It’s not as if the Resistance will welcome me with open arms. I’m not even sure if _she_ would!”

Obi-Wan nodded, his expression sage-like. “Of course,” he intoned. “You should just continue with what you’re doing now. It’s going just fine for you, clearly. It’s not like it’s insane to keep doing the same thing over and over again and expect different results.”

“The sarcasm is not necessary,” Kylo bit out sharply.

“Jedi don’t use sarcasm,” Obi-Wan replied airily. “We’re above that sort of humor.”

Kylo roared, kicking his side table across the room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, as always! I seriously appreciate all of you wonderful people. :)


	8. A Step Backwards

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Poe's instincts are pretty spot on. Rey wants to punch Kylo Ren in the face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, here we are again.

Finn sighed, clean shaven chin resting in the palm of his hand. The on-base Cantina was small and dingy, the alcohol cheap but strong enough to get him blind drunk. He wasn’t quite there yet, but it wouldn’t take him much longer. He shouldn’t have been upset, really. It was not as if Rey had ever given him reason to think _they_ were a possibility.

He was reminded then of hugging her on Starkiller Base, and her soft warmth. The tickle of her silky hair on his cheek was still fresh in his mind, despite the time that had passed since then.

Finn frowned to himself, waving to the bartender.

He lifted a fresh drink to his lips, only for a tanned hand to reach over his head and snatch the glass from his fingertips.

Finn, exasperated by the unwanted interruption, turned to watch Poe empty the glass with a single swig. Poe sat at the stool beside him with a snicker, giving him a rough pat on the back. Finn grunted at the forceful slap, rolling his eyes at his friend’s overly enthusiastic greeting.

“What’s all this?” Poe asked with a laugh. “Alcohol is for celebrating, not wallowing.”   
Finn groaned, resting his forehead on the bar. “I think it works pretty great for self-pity, thank you very much.”

Poe patted his shoulder, gently this time. “Talk to me, pal. Maybe I can help.”

Finn gave him a withered look from the corner of his eye, not lifting his head from the tabletop. “Somehow, I doubt this is a problem that you’ve ever had.”

Poe’s grin was infectious and persuasive. “You don’t know that.”

Finn barked a humorless laugh of his own. “Okay, if you say so.”

He rolled his shoulder, slowly exhaling. “Rey rejected me. Kind of. I’m not really sure. I didn’t exactly ask her out, or anything, but she shut me down.”

“Ah.”

Finn jolted upward, whirling his head around. “See, I knew you wouldn’t understand.”

Poe’s response was positively wicked. “Well, yeah, but that has more to do with the fact my partners usually last a night. If that.”

Finn shook his head with a sneer. “Haven’t you run out of people on base to sleep with?”

Poe winked flirtatiously. “Not nearly. There’s always new recruits.”

Finn was thankful that the dark pigment of his skin hid the warmth spreading across his cheeks.

“Anyway--” he started to grumble, only for Poe to interrupt him with a rambunctious cackle. “--Rey isn’t interested. I tried to flirt a bit, and then she just stared into the distance. As if I wasn’t there.”

Poe signaled to the bartender, who quickly brought them both new drinks. He swiftly downed his, and Finn was quick to follow.

“Buddy,” he sighed, “I hate to ask this...but is it possible she met someone else?”

“Like who?” Finn yelped, startled by the idea. “She’s been training in the middle of nowhere! Do you think it’s Master Skywalker? He’s old--and shriveled, I bet! And everyone’s saying he’s a virgin! That’s her type?”

Poe shrugged. “Nothing would surprise me, to be honest.”

“You’re so unhelpful,” Finn muttered with a halfhearted glare. “Get drunk with me.”

“Well,” he smirked, “I do aim to please.”

“Ugh.”

* * *

Rey tossed, then turned. Sleep was evasive, and she knew just who to blame. Though she couldn’t pretend to be surprised by it, Kylo had returned to radio silence after their...kiss, for lack of a better word to describe the sensation they had shared through the force. It had scared him off, and while she didn’t think he could ignore her forever, he showed no intention of yielding.

 _I can’t sleep,_ she informed him, just a murmur pressed to the back of his skull.

Still, he said nothing.

 _I don’t like this,_ she continued, tone flat. _In fact, that was the point of what I told you before. I want you around._

His pledge to silence would not be broken so easily, it seemed.

Rey growled into the darkness of her quarters, flopping indignantly onto her back. Their role reversal was giving her whiplash. She had pushed his gentle prodding away for so long, she never anticipated he would one day respond to her with similar treatment.

With very little else to do, she sat up, crossing her legs. Perhaps meditation would offer her some peace, if hearing his voice did not. Before she knew it, Rey was seeking out his presence. It was faint, and sudden fear swallowed her in one bite. Could his life be in danger? Was he hurt?

Rey wanted to think he would tell her if he was dying, but she couldn’t convince herself that he would. Especially if his being in danger was because of her, and their inexplicable relationship. She tried to test his mind for a way in, to gain some sort of understanding.

_You would let me know if you were in trouble, right?_

She couldn’t fully disguise the genuine concern she felt for him, and it must have been that, that finally caused a slight shift between them.

_Do you think me so weak?_

Then the crack that had let his voice through was sealed tight once more.

 _No!_ she yelled, _I never said that. And do you actually enjoy my worrying over you? Take responsibility for making me feel like this and let me in._

Rey scratched at his barrier, knowing full well how futile it was.

Again, it was just a moment that he let his mind reach hers. _No._

Rey was tempted to scream into her pillow. He was acting like a petulant child, and she was more than just frustrated with his decision to keep her at an arm's length.

_You’re treating me like I’m your enemy._

His walls came tumbling down with a thunderous bellow, and it stunned her.

 _I_ am _your enemy, Rey, or have you forgotten that? As entertaining as this has been, I can’t choose you over the First Order! I’ve sacrificed everything for them, and I’m not going to turn away from the dark for you! I’m a monster, remember? You said so yourself._

For a moment, the sharp edge of his words cut into her, and all she can feel is the pain of betrayal in her chest. Then her long-lived rage returned.

 _So that’s it?_ she hollered. _You wait until I actually have feelings for you, and you decide to run away? Grow up!_

For a few seconds, she thought he was gone again, with nothing more to say. He had needed a moment to process.

 _It doesn’t matter what you feel for me,_ he hissed. _When we see each other again, we’re going to have to fight! Nothing can change that fate._

 _The only person you’re protecting is yourself!_ Rey snarled. _And you’re not even doing a good job of it. You’re so afraid of your own potential that you’re running from one of the only people who cares for you._

 _You don’t care about me!_ Kylo howled back at her. _You’re just an arrogant, self-righteous Jedi-to-be who thinks she can save me. I don’t need to be saved, least of all by you!_

She was truly wounded by his blows, and it felt more like she had been physically struck in the gut. An unexpected sob ripped from her throat, and she sensed some small guilt in him, but it didn’t nearly make up for his accusation.

Infuriated, she shrieked at him. _Oh, yeah? I bet your dick is tiny, and you’re trying to compensate for it with your shitty personality! I bet you can’t even keep it up! Go shove that stupid, broken lightsaber of yours up your ass! It’s not as if you have a better use for it!_

She didn’t feel a bit better when he angrily screeched back, or even when she tuned him out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Probably not as funny as previous chapters, but I have the tendency to doubt myself. Before anyone asks, I do ship stormpilot, but they aren't really the focus of this fic.
> 
> Thanks for all the comments/kudos/general love. You guys are seriously the best.


	9. Face to Face

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The truth had to come out eventually.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for the delay! I've been distracted by a one-shot, and then I had two papers due in as many days. This one wasn't all that funny, but more about moving the plot along. Humor will return with the next chapter, for sure!

Their silence, now a mutual decision to uphold, had stretched on for weeks. Rey was still angry with him, and she was sure he could sense it. He, however, was a blank, unreadable slate, and she didn’t try to reach past his surface to understand exactly what he felt.

It was inevitable that they meet again, and she knew it would happen soon. The Resistance was on the move, and it would not be much longer before they were prepared to make a stand against the First Order once more.

What she had not expected, however, was to be made a leader in their infiltration mission.

“The last time I asked someone to bring home my son, they didn’t make it back,” General Organa informed her quietly, after pulling her aside for a moment of privacy.

Rey didn’t want to think about Kylo. She had every reason to stay furious with him; after all, they were enemies, as he had so cruelly reminded her. Still, she could not help but to feel the General’s own desperation and sadness acutely enough for it to be her own. Unable to properly speak the right words, she opted to hug the older woman.

“I know it’s a lot to ask of you, Rey,” she continued, voice faltering for a moment. “I would be upset if anything were to happen to you. I feel incredibly selfish to even go to you, but...”

“He’s your son,” she finished quietly.

Rey understood, all too well. Having spent enough time waiting for her own family, she could recognize the years of loneliness that weighed down General Organa’s shoulders. As frustrated as she was with Kylo, she could no longer allow him to do as he pleased, for his mother’s sake.

“I’ll do what I can,” she murmured. She wouldn’t promise anything, though.

The general nodded, pulling away from Rey with a watery smile. “It means more to me than I can say.”

Rey nodded, offering a small grin.

“Oh,” she added, tone changing, “be sure to slap Ben away if he gets too handsy. I’m not sure how I feel about my little boy busting moves through the force.”

Rey squeaked. “General!”

It was unsurprising that Master Luke would have told his sister something about their...connection, but Rey had never anticipated General Organa bringing it up with her. And the thought of Kylo Ren being little, in any connotation, seemed wrong.

“Don’t play coy with me,” she replied, patting her arm. “Luke said he had to give you a refresher course in safe sex.”

Her eyes widened with horror and embarrassment. She couldn't believe her master would share so much.

Rey’s voice was barely a rasp. “He didn’t _have_ to do anything! And I’m not playing coy.”

If Rey didn’t know better, she would have thought the general looked relieved, though disbelieving. The woman’s eyes narrowed in suspicion.

“He’s _my_ kid. I’m sure he’s very good looking.”

Rey leaned closer when a pair of pilots passed by. “It’s not ever going to happen, I swear. He’s no longer interested, and I’m certainly not.”

As soon as Rey had said it, she knew she shouldn’t have sworn anything.

* * *

Getting aboard the Finalizer was an easier task than Rey anticipated. Apparently, things tended to go smoothly when one offered to surrender to the enemy. Master Luke claimed that a similar plan of his had gone swimmingly when he had fought against The Empire, and though she had her doubts, Rey trusted his judgement. She strolled off the Millennium Falcon and into the sleek, black hangar bay with her hands held before her in a position as unassuming as possible, ready for binders.

An astonished Stormtrooper raised his blaster to her.

“That isn’t necessary,” she said flatly. “I’m clearly giving myself up.”

Finn, then Poe, appeared beside her, as bemused as the Stormtrooper.

“I don’t really blame him,” Finn muttered, lifting his own wrists. “This plan of Master Skywalker’s is completely idiotic. Who tries to bring down the enemy by becoming their prisoner?”

Rey shushed him with a frown, then turned to the shaken Stormtrooper intently. “You will take us to Kylo Ren. I know he’s aboard.”

Finn was about to complain more--why would he take them directly before the Master of the Knights of Ren? That didn’t follow protocol--but the Stormtrooper straightened slightly, the blaster’s aim dropping to the floor.

“I will take you to Kylo Ren,” the Stormtrooper replied, his voice strangely dazed. “You know he’s aboard.”

Rey cracked a brief smirk as the Stormtrooper retrieved some binders. She had expected at least a little bit of a challenge, but the troopers really were weak minded to her Jedi training.

“Well,” Poe sighed as his hands were cuffed, “this is going better than most of our plans do.”

* * *

Kylo Ren was at Command when Rey strolled in, dismissing their Stormtrooper escort with a nudge of her chin. Poe Dameron and Finn were at her flanks, looking a bit less confident than she felt, but she knew Kylo wouldn’t be looking at them. He stared at her through his mask, and she could feel his eyes fixed on her.

For a moment, she was overwhelmed by his longing, and it shocked her. He reigned it in quickly, turning away from the fair-haired officer he had been speaking with to face her fully.

“Rey,” he growled as he started towards her, “you are by far the stupidest person I have ever known. Are you _trying_ to force my hand?”

“If you want to talk to me, I need to see your face. I’m not speaking to that dumb mask.”

Poe huffed behind her, understanding crossing his features. Rey sensed it, but couldn’t care. She couldn’t look away from Kylo.

Kylo didn’t stop his approach as he reached up to release the fastenings of his mask, and he dropped it unceremoniously.

“I know I said we were enemies, but I do not want to have to do this right now.” Without the voice-altering apparatus, she recognized the sound of him, and it made her feel heated. 

Her heart then lurched at the sight of his troubled expression, cleaved by the scar she had given him. He was miserable, she could tell, and while she was still outraged by his very existence, it was difficult to hate him. He violently tore his gloves from his fingers, letting them, too, fall.

“You don’t have to do anything,” she replied, and now he was only inches away.

He loomed over her pleasantly, and he lacked hesitation as he pressed his palms, surprisingly warm, to her cheeks, tipping her face upward, his fingers in her hair.

“Yes, I do.”

She leaned into his kiss as he descended upon her, his lips gentle against hers.

“I hate you,” he breathed against her mouth.

She tilted her face slightly, amused. “No, you don’t.”

He nodded with agreement, nose pressed into her cheek as he parted his lips to her. “No, I don’t.”

She tasted the sweetness of his breath, felt the moisture of his tongue as it glided beside hers, and as enjoyable as their previous kiss had been, nothing could compare to the real thing.

It seemed reality would not let them be, and Finn could not keep silent.

“You turned me down for an asshole in a dress?” he shouted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think! Thanks for reading/all the love. :)


	10. Negotiations Were Short

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chaos ensues.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THIS IS THE DUMBEST THING EVER.

Hux barked a laugh, despite himself. The rogue Stormtrooper, FN-2187, was rather gutsy to dare call the master of the Knights of Ren names, though he had never heard Kylo Ren so aptly described. _An asshole in a dress._ It was impossible to keep the sneer from his face.

He approached the canoodling couple with a quiet snicker, clapping Kylo firmly on the back with mock congratulations.

“Kylo Ren, either take her to your quarters, or knock it off. I don’t need her _really_ hairy legs splayed across my Command Deck.”

There was a sudden, shrill cry from Kylo Ren, and he ripped his face away from Rey and stumbled back, shocked and offended, his lower lip bleeding. He lifted his hand to his mouth, grimacing.

“That was completely unnecessary,” he growled, curling back his lower lip and swiping away beads of blood with his thumb.

“No, it was,” she roared back at him, her face a ferocious red of embarrassment and rage. “I can’t believe you told some red-headed prick from the First Order about the Wookie legs! Did you need some pervert’s permission to continue flirting, or something? You weren’t gonna _tap that_ unless someone gave you approval?”

He floundered for a moment, astonished by her quick tongue. “What? No--”

Hux glided in beside him. “That’s exactly what it was,” he said, “though I don’t appreciate being called a pervert.”

Rey’s mouth clamped shut, and she glared back and forth at the two men towering over her.

“My legs--” she seethed, kicking off a boot in the direction of Kylo’s head. He ducked the boot, but she knocked him down with the sole of her barefoot in his moment of distraction, “--are perfectly smooth and sculpted, you sicko.”

Planting her foot on his chest, her hands still bound, she hiked up her relatively loose trouser leg to reveal a long stretch of soft skin, nary a hair in sight. It was as she said, Kylo realized, his expression awed by her.

“Kinky,” Hux commented, his tone dry.

Kylo’s hand came up to graze her exposed calf, and he replied with a mumble. “I’m _so_ getting laid tonight.”

“No!” Finn interjected, his voice scolding. “No, not kinky,” he said with a rough point to General Hux, “and you are _so_ not getting laid,” he finished with a glower towards Kylo.

“Buddy,” Poe pulled him back, “don’t worry about it. Rey’s a big girl, she can handle herself. I’ll take care of you.”

Kylo glanced away from the duo and directed his gaze back at Rey, still standing above him. “Why did you bring them with you?”

Rey frowned down at him, dropping her trouser leg, but he wouldn’t move away. His hand, still clutching the curved musculature of her calf, drifted to behind her knee, where he had once envisioned latching his mouth to.

“Did you want me to infiltrate an enemy ship on my own?” she raised an eyebrow to him.

He huffed. “No...”

She smirked, rather pleased with herself. Luke’s plan had veered a bit off course--Rey was certain he hadn’t anticipated Kylo dropping everything to kiss her--but she was flexible enough to adapt to her new situation. Her master was going to be less than pleased when he learned exactly how she had bested Kylo Ren.

“Are you planning to keep me in binders?” she continued with a question.

He looked at her hands, then smirked. “I don’t know. Maybe.”

* * *

Obi-Wan had seen this Skywalker flail about because of his stupid crush for much too long. As slow as the Skywalker boys tended to be, his dealings with Ben were bordering ridiculous, and he had just about reached his boiling point. Enough was enough. This brat needed a good talking to.

He appeared with a scowl, leaning over his head, his voice a bellow. _“Anakin--”_

Obi-Wan stopped himself, surprised by his own slip. Though it made sense, considering he hadn’t been so angry with anyone since the first screwed up Skywalker.

He corrected himself, only slightly calmer. “Ben, I swear, you’re going to manage to kill me a second time, and that isn’t even possible! You’ve completely ignored my teachings.”

Kylo beamed up at the ghostly figure. “You think I’m like my grandfather!”

Obi-Wan narrowed his eyes at him, unamused that the majority of his accusation had been completely ignored in favor for the one thing he had wanted to hear. “Yes. You’re just like Anakin was. Reckless, thoughtless, and a horrible student. Bravo. How many times must I tell you, insulting a girl only to hit on her a second later is never going to work.”

Rey stepped from his chest, and his hand slid from her leg, landing on his stomach.

“You’ve been getting advice from a Jedi?” Rey asked, a snicker at the back of her throat. She squatted next to his head, carelessly patting his cheek. “That’s surprisingly sweet.”

Hux finally sighed. Whatever Kylo Ren and his _friend_ was talking about, he couldn’t sense it. “This is why I hate dealing with ‘the force.’ I’m just going to have a squad join us and finally put an end to this ridiculous charade.”

“I’m with this guy,” Finn grumbled, “and I hate him. And he’s calling in certain death.”

“Sweet enough to...” he trailed off, but his gaze was meaningful.

Rey froze when her vision was suddenly bombarded by a vision of them in a variety of rather compromising positions. Her mouth went dry, her lips pressed together in a thin line, and she felt her face warm.

“You really _are_ going to be the death of me!” Obi-Wan snapped. “What did I just say--”

Rey, slightly embarrassed, lifted her hands to stop him. Her voice cracked noticeably. “No, actually, that was pretty hot.”

“Hot enough to...?”

Rey smirked, her new plan finally cementing in her mind. She had a very good feeling that it would be more successful than anything Luke could have come up with.

“Maybe,” she smiled, “back on the Resistance base.”

Hux groaned. “You have got to be kidding me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks again lovelies for all the kudos/views/comments! You guys are the best. :)


	11. Being Evil doesn't Pay Off

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time to leave the Finalizer in style.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think we're getting closer to the end. Also, I love Phasma.

Phasma had no knowledge of the force. Nor did she have any desire to understand the mystical power that Supreme Leader and Kylo Ren utilized. Blasters were just a reliable as any transcendental _force_ , and much more straightforward, which served her purposes nicely. So, when she sensed a disturbance, it was not in the force. After years of service in the First Order military, she had developed an instinct, and learned to rely on her gut feelings.

She could not know what it was, but something was undeniably _off_. Though she was in the middle of a much needed break, Phasma pulled her armor back on and grudgingly left the comfort of her quarters to investigate. If she could sense something was wrong, then Kylo Ren must have been going haywire.

She headed for the bridge, stepping onto the command deck just in time to witness a relatively short woman pull her fist back and launch it directly in General Hux’s face. The general stumbled back with a wail, clutching a bloodied, broken nose.

Phasma rushed forward. “Sir!”

“I can’t believe you,” Hux gave a nasally snarl with bared teeth, now stained crimson from the blood trickling into his open mouth. “Of all the insanely idiotic things you could do, Kylo Ren, I never expected you to betray the Order.”

Phasma, her gloved hand on General Hux’s shoulder to keep him standing, shot a glance at Kylo Ren in surprise. Then she noticed FN-2187 standing beside the Resistance pilot only a few feet back.

“What is the meaning of this?”

“It shouldn’t be that surprising,” Kylo shrugged in response. “I betrayed my parents to join the First Order. It had to happen eventually.”

“Great,” the pilot muttered, “can we just go before the entire ship knows we’re here?”

Phasma was not satisfied. “Wait just a moment, Resistance scum,” she stepped around the general with her blaster pointed at the pilot. “I’m not letting you, or FN-2187 out of my sights.”

Someone had to pay for turning her best trooper, and this pretty-boy Poe Dameron seemed the best to blame. She was still upset to have lost FN-2187, perhaps the stormtrooper with the most potential of his class.

“My name is Finn! I’ve already told you that.”

“Oh, I remember,” she growled, “You told me just before shoving me down a garbage chute. I definitely haven’t forgotten that.”

The pilot-- _Poe_ \--gave the ex-trooper an incredulous look. “You threw your mom down a garbage chute? I mean, I know she’s evil, but--”

“She’s not my mom!” Finn yelped.

Phasma felt somehow hurt by this comment. She couldn’t decide quite why; perhaps it was the implication that she was at all evil, or maybe it was how adamantly her trooper denied any connection to her. She was a strong woman, though, and straightened her back.

“Enough,” she barked. “FN-2187, I am ordering you to reconditioning.”

“All I’m saying,” Poe lifted his bound hands in defense, “is that this looks an awful lot like a kid getting scolded by his mom. Is reconditioning like getting slapped on the wrist for eating sweets before dinner?”

Finn is properly distressed by this assumption. “What? No!”

Phasma stomped closer, until her blaster was pressed to Poe’s chest. “Shut it, you. I’m still angry that you seduced one of my best troopers.”

Finn started at that. “He didn’t _seduce_ me--”

“Finn, buddy, let it go. She’s gonna think whatever she wants. It doesn’t matter.”

Phasma would have said more, if not for the shuddering, feminine moan that erupted behind her. She whipped her head about, the two men she was confronting stepping to look around her. The woman that had broken Hux’s nose was now straddling a prone Kylo Ren, her robes pulled loose enough for him to latch his mouth to her exposed collarbone. Phasma grimaced at the sight of them. Hux, meanwhile, had a pair of binders on his wrists, one of his gloves shoved into his mouth, his expression utterly annoyed.

“That’s just gross,” Finn gagged. “Can’t they do that where no one has to look at it?”

Phasma found herself agreeing. “Completely indecent.”

Kylo Ren released her skin with a moist pop of his mouth and a loud sigh, and she cringed alongside Poe and Finn.

* * *

Rey’s legs shook as she clumsily slid off Kylo, breathlessly laughing at his wild expression and mused hair.

“We’re going. Now,” she declared, breaking into a run with a competitive grin.

Finn, who stood closest to Captain Phasma, snatched her blaster in the moment of confusion, and the binders fell from him and Poe with a wave of Rey’s hand. They clattered to the ground.

“I’m shit at being evil anyway. It doesn’t pay off at _all,”_ Kylo quickly followed after her, snickering as he flicked a pair of binders back up and cuffing Phasma with them. He sounded a bit too pleased with himself, sprinting fast enough to streak past Rey.

“Finally!” Finn crowed as he gave chase with Poe. “Peace out, Phas-mom.”

“Finn, pal,” Poe snickered, “she’s so your mom.”

“Shut up!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have been thinking about this throughout the story, and at last, I feel that I should just ask my readers what they think. 
> 
> How would you guys feel about a rating change/a very awkward sex scene? I didn't originally plan to write one for this fic, but it could be funny because let's be honest here, Kylo is totally a virgin and has no idea what he's doing. Let me know what you think in the comments below! I'm not going to promise anything, but I just want to get a general feel for what you guys would think.


	12. Breaking Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo is much more like his father than he would care to admit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, I'm finally finishing up this arc. To be perfectly honest, this fic has gone on much longer than I thought it would.

Kylo knew he was being rash. Yet, it was enthralling to run down the dark halls of the Finalizer like he never had before, Rey’s smaller hand in his. He had known it was a mistake, the moment he saw her casually walk into Command, the moment he removed his mask, the moment he finally kissed her as he had always wanted to. There was not going to be a clean ending, just because he was finally deciding to do the right thing. The Resistance would surely see to that.

He couldn’t think about that yet, though.

“Hey, she doesn’t like it when people hold her hand!” Finn breathlessly yelled after them, struggling to keep their impossible pace. “You hear me, you lanky pretty-boy?”

Kylo shot an amused look over his shoulder at the put-out man. “She does when _I_ do it,” he smirked, squeezing her hand for a moment.

Rey laughed to herself when Finn gave an offended shriek.

 _Oh, leave the poor guy alone,_ she scolded. _He has a huge crush on me._

He had missed her voice in his head so much. It had been painful to push Rey away, but he had been desperate. Kylo had sacrificed so much to the First Order, had spent miserable years dedicating himself to an organization that wanted him to kill what little family he had left. Now he was giving it all up to follow her into the unknown future, where he would likely end up executed or imprisoned or nearly worse--yelled at by his mother.

She must have sensed his distress, and squeezed his hand back.

Kylo had known that if he ever saw her face, he would make the decision to leave. It would be almost involuntary. Still, he couldn’t regret it quite yet.

 _And that’s my problem because...?_ he finally replied.

She elbowed him, but he could hear her quiet snickers.

Kylo looked ahead--they had run down these halls for a solid minute without meeting anyone--only to find a squad of stormtroopers turning towards them at intersecting hallway. He swore under his breath.

“Okay,” he stumbled to a more sedate walk, “just act cool.”

Someone, he suspected Finn, barreled into his back, unable to stop soon enough. Poe laughed, and Kylo wasn’t sure if it was because someone had almost knocked him over, or because of his comment.

Rey slipped from his hand and fell behind him, and he knew the other two had formed a line with her.

“Look like you’ve just been captured and you’re very afraid,” he hissed back at them, stomping forward.

“I _am_ afraid,” Finn grumbled back. “Afraid of the evil magic you must use to keep your hair like that from under a helmet.”

Kylo rolled his eyes, having no time to rebuke him. The squad paused at the sight of them as they met.

“Sir,” the squad leader addressed him with no small hesitancy, “why aren’t your prisoners cuffed?”

He swore under his breath, sending the group behind him an annoyed look. Couldn’t they have at least pretended to be in binders? He stepped towards the squad leader, who instinctively bent backwards when he leaned over him with the most menacing look he could muster.

“Are you questioning _my_ methods, Stormtrooper?”

“No, sir, of course not! It’s just that, one of them has a blaster, and--”

In his years aboard the Finalizer, no one had ever made use of the intercom system. At least, not until that moment. Phasma and Hux had freed themselves much sooner than Kylo had anticipated. He grimaced at the familiar yell, now being projected all over the Finalizer.

“KYLO REN! IF YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST BIND ME AND THEN ESCAPE _MY_ SHIP, YOU HAVE ANOTHER THING COMING! I DON’T CARE HOW NICE THAT SCAVENGER’S LEGS ARE, YOU CAN’T JUST--”

There was a sound of a slight scuffle as someone physically removed Hux from the Comm. Another voice replaced his, much calmer than the previous speaker.

“Troopers, we have a turncoat on our hands. Neutralize the traitor Kylo Ren and his associates,” Phasma barked her order, and then the comm was silent.

Ten blasters simultaneously turned on them. He and Rey had no need to exchange words, they both knew what to do. Kylo darted his hand up just as she did, and together they pushed the squad back with the force, throwing them hard enough to knock them against the wall.

“I’d act unconscious, or he might kill you,” Rey called to the pile of white armor and tangled limbs as she tore into a sprint, tugging him along with her.

Kylo let her pull him away, and Finn groaned as they moved together. “What are they now, the new power couple?”

“Finn, pal, just let it go--”

“Shut up back there!” Kylo snapped. “Are you trying to get us caught--”

Another squad appeared ahead.

“--for fuck’s sake! Why are there so many of these assholes around?”

He led them down another corridor, racing for the main hangar.

* * *

He was irritated, Rey knew, but she could still feel his happiness. It was as if a massive weight had lifted from him, and he was overwhelmed by the foreign sense of relief. She was no longer angry with him, at least not for ignoring her. She was bringing him towards something terrifying; punishment was certain. But he was still warm with glee and excitement, so different from any moment they had ever shared.

 _We’ll figure this out,_ she assured him as they finally reached the hangar, now flooded with troopers.

His response was clipped. _You came on the Falcon? One of the most infamous ships in the galaxy, and you’re trying to be sneaky in it?_

“Of course I brought the Falcon!” she bit back out loud, ducking under enemy fire. “You’re lucky Chewie didn’t come along!”

He grumbled, storming aboard the smuggler craft. She followed after him, brushing past him to fall into the cockpit. She took the captain’s seat, fingers brushing over the controls with ease. She was a bit surprised when he took the copilot’s spot, familiar enough with the ship to help her quickly prepare for take-off.

“This is my father’s ship,” he reminded her when he caught her staring. “I grew up in this seat.”

She shook her head, not allowing herself to wallow on darker thoughts. Of course he would know how to fly the Millennium Falcon.

“I have a bad feeling about this,” Finn commented as he took the seat behind her.

The Falcon lifted off and launched out of the hangar, flying into open space.

“Odds are, they’re tracking--”

Rey is startled when Kylo whipped around to interrupt.

“You,” he pointed at Finn, “don’t ever say you _have a bad feeling about this_ , because then something is bound to happen. And you,” he turned with a glare at Poe, “Don’t ever tell me the odds!”

Rey reached for the hyperdrive. “You all need to shut up,” she decided, flipping it.

They lurched forward into hyperspace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There was a pretty strong consensus, so expect a rating change in the next chapter! Smut is approaching.


	13. Making Fun

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey finds that Kylo is surprisingly easy to tease.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised, smut! I changed the rating for a reason, believe me. And just to show how much I love you guys, have an extra long chapter. :)

“We have a few hours of travel through hyperspace. I’m getting some rest,” she informed the group, getting to her feet. She looked at Poe. “Can you handle the Falcon?”

“I can fly anything,” he reminded her with a too-broad smile. He knew that she was planning on more than just rest.

Kylo, however, did not sense her meaning, and entered her mind with a tone of panic. _You’re going to leave me here? With these two? I thought we..._

She snickered in his head as she left the cockpit. _We are, stupid. So follow after me._

The chair squeaked slightly as he scrambled after her, nearly falling over himself as he rushed out the cockpit to follow Rey. She laughed out loud at his anticipation and jogged away, towards the crew’s quarters. Just to tease him, she kicked her boots off as she went, leaving them in the narrow corridor before dropping her trousers along the trail. He cursed, and she wasn’t sure if it was because he knew she was pants-less, or if it was because he had tripped over the pair she had left in the hall.

“I don’t want to hear a single thing!” Finn roared after them, “Not one sound!”

 _I should make him hear everything,_ he grumbled.

 _No, you shouldn’t!_ she chided with a laugh, stumbling into a small room with a single bunk as she pulled her loose robes over her head. There wasn’t much space above it. No room could be wasted, and so there was a series of storage units built into the durasteel wall, hovering about three feet above the bed.

She flopped herself back onto the bunk, grunting when the mattress didn’t give as much as she expected. He rushed in just in time to see her yank her hair free, his own robes disheveled. Rey watched, smirking, as he swallowed thickly, his exposed and rather prominent Adam’s apple bobbing. She curled her finger at him, beckoning him closer.

He floundered forward, a gangly mass of limbs--he had tripped on his rumpled robes--and she cackled as she caught him, barely.

 _Don’t make fun of me,_ he huffed, the tops of his cheeks burning red. He crawled over her, face level with hers.

She beamed up at him in response, tugging him downward with a little too much force, but then his mouth was on hers, his lips full and addictive. Rey sighed into him, licking her lips before parting them, and he angled his face to skim his tongue against hers, his knee gliding between her thighs.

 _You’re wearing too much,_ she informed him, his hand on her toned belly and drifting upwards. He hummed, agreeing, but did nothing to change his current status, instead covering a bound breast with his warm palm. She arched into his touch, yanking at his overabundant layers when he wouldn’t do so himself. It took way too much work to free his torso from its black coverings.

He thumbed at the edge of her bindings. _May I?_

 _Please,_ and she moaned aloud when his knee nudged against where her legs met.

He ripped them away, palm once more covering her soft flesh and gently massaging, his grip on her firm and possessive.

His mouth lifted from hers, then found her throat. He couldn’t form the words in his head, but she felt the longing that overwhelmed his entire being as it seeped into her mind. It made her feel needy, and he was more than happy to oblige.

She gasped when he lowered himself closer to her and something hot and hard pressed into her stomach. _Oh! You’re so--_

Her nails dug into his scalp, brushing hair aside, away from his face until--

“--Big,” she finished in surprise. “Your ears are huge,” she laughed, unable to stop herself.

Caught off guard, he sat up too abruptly, smacking his head against the storage unit above them. “Fuck!”

Rey was still giggling when she asked him if he was okay.

He gave her a withering glare as he rubbed the back of his head, the flush that had spread across his face now reaching the tips of his large ears.

“Oh, relax,” she grinned, tipping him forward and lingering over him. “I think your big ears are cute.”

His tone was grudging. “They are not cu-- _ahhh--”_

She closed her teeth around the lobe of his ear and _sucked_ , effectively cutting him off.

“I think they are,” she whispered into the shell of his ear, tittering with laughter when he shuddered.

She nipped at his ear again, more playfully this time. His hands grazed along her sides, her naked chest flat against his, and she gently slid downward, biting at the pale skin of his shoulder and collarbone. He hissed in surprise, his head lifting from the mattress as she dragged her mouth lower, and she met his gaze with an amused one of her own.

“Rey,” his voice cracked, “what are you...”

“What do you think?” she simpered, deft fingers popping the clasp to his trousers and wrenching the zipper down. He sprung free, and she couldn’t help but to be impressed. She felt like a scavenger all over again, and this was a wonderful find.

“This is huge too,” she teased, puffing warm air onto his straining erection.

He gasped, head falling back against the bed as she flicked her tongue out to taste the salty skin of his swollen tip. His voice was a snarl in her head. _Don’t play with me._

She yanked his pants down to his knees. _You need to learn how to have fun, Kylo._

 _I know how to have fun,_ he griped, but then she was making a broad swipe with her tongue up the length of him, and coherency was lost on him. She wrapped her mouth around him and hummed against his flesh, watching as his face contorted, then slowly brought more of him into her.

Rey formed a fist around the part of him she couldn’t reach without gagging, her mouth and hand moving up and down together in unison until he was gritting his teeth, the veins of his neck taut.

“You need to stop, or I’m going to...”

She released him with an obscene smack of her mouth, grinning with lips swollen violent red.

He made a strange squawking sound in the back of his throat, and she chuckled loudly, utterly unprepared for him to pull himself out from under her and press her forward. She was taken by surprise when he tore her underwear down her thighs, the material embarrassingly sopping with her arousal.

He looked awed as she parted her legs fully, hot moisture glistening. She was pliant to his touch, and when he gathered her hips in his arms to pull her closer, she hissed at the feel of his cock against her. Still, he could only stare with amazement at the slick, pink folds of her sex. Humored by his expression, she spread her puckering lower lips with two fingers for him to properly view her, and she watched as he swallowed again, his tongue darting out to wet his lips.

“Are you going to keep staring forever, or are you going to actually touch me?” she asked when he did nothing.

“I’m going to touch you,” he murmured, still unable to draw his gaze away.

“So touch me,” she ordered back.

A single finger drew a slow line up her slit, gathering wetness as it travelled. He brought the finger up to his mouth, and she stared at him as he swiped his tongue along the digit. _Oh,_ that did funny things to her insides, and suddenly she was impatient to be touched again, desire making her want to squirm.

He sensed her desperation, and his hands were on her again, stroking, prodding, circling her clit until she couldn’t take another minute, second of him not being inside her.

Rey hooked her feet around his lower back. “Kylo, I swear, if you don’t start fucking me right now, I might really kill you.”

He smirked, pleased that he had turned her into such a mess. “Oh, I’m going to fuck you alri--”

 _“Now!”_ she repeated roughly.

Thankfully he needed no further instruction from her, because then he was entering her, inch by torturous inch, a deep, guttural sound erupting from his chest as she sighed, clutching the muscles of his back, blunt nails clipping his skin.

Her lips blindly found his, his kiss greedy and devouring as he set a pace she knew neither of them would be able to maintain for very long. He was like an animal that had been deprived, his hips snapping relentlessly against hers, the sweaty slaps of their bodies reverberating in the small room.

“Rey,” he panted into her open mouth, “you’re incredible.”

She groaned, unable to keep her voice down if she tried, before catching his lower lip in her mouth. She could feel his orgasm approaching, and it only heightened her own pleasure with each hammering of his hips.

 _Make me come,_ she begged, her voice lost in her escalating cries. _Please, Kylo!_

One of his hands left its grasp on her waist, and he reached between them to knead at her clit with his thumb, thrusting faster, reaching closer--

She wailed, fluttering around his unceasing momentum in her burning orgasm, her head thrown back with no abandon. His lips found hers once more when he found his own, his hips stuttering, her mouth swallowing the broken sob of his release.

* * *

Rey was completely content to stay on the hard bunk for the rest of eternity, body still intimately joined with Kylo’s, his chest a cushion for her head. He was, in fact, a very talented snuggler, and though she never would have suspected herself to enjoy being _snuggled,_ with him it was very nice.

But then he was moving, taking his warmth with him, and she felt empty and cold all at once. Limbs akimbo, she watched as he stretched and stood, his well sculpted backside to her. Unrestrained, she leaned up to smack it with the palm of her hand, and when he yelped, startled, she fell back onto the bed in a fit of giggles.

When he shot a flat stare back at her, she could only smile innocently up at him. “It’s your fault for leaving the bed.”

He sighed, crossing the room in two steps, but she could see the tips of his ears were bright pink.

“What are you doing?” she finally asked after watching him dig through different supply units, seemingly searching for something in particular.

Kylo spared her a glance. “This is a smuggling vessel. A lot of scams have been pulled with the Millennium Falcon, over the years, so I imagine it should still have a few disguises aboard.”

She sat up with a peal of laughter. “Disguises? You can’t be serious!”

He found what he was looking for. She watched in amazement as he settled a ratty, blond wig over his head, tucking black locks of hair under it. He turned to her with bruised lips, his expression serious, and she only laughed harder.

“Not convincing?” he asked, not amused.

“Kylo, that looks ridiculous.”

He huffed, returning to the storage boxes. “What are you suggesting, then?”

“A pair of glasses?” she joked, cackling when he grabbed a pair from the mess.

“I’m not being serious!” she continued, grinning when he frowned at her. She pushed herself off the bunk and followed him to the storage. “It’s not as if anyone in the Resistance has ever seen your face. How are they supposed to know who you are? A disguise is completely pointless.”

He was not convinced, and his face showed it.

“Fine,” she said. “I still think it’s ridiculous.”

“Your opinion is duly noted.”

* * *

“That wasn’t very quiet,” Finn informed her, grumbling when she returned to the cockpit.

Poe turned to give her a high-five. “Yeah, you guys were loud as hell. And that’s coming from _me.”_

He paused when he saw the blond-haired menace behind her, and Rey could only sigh as he barked a laugh. “What the hell? Your disguise is more suspicious than your actual face.”

“Meet Matt,” she groused, flopping herself into the copilot’s seat. “Apparently we rescued him from the clutches of the First Order.”

“I’m a radar technician,” Kylo informed them with a quiet threat.

Rey made a point to exhale loudly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heheheheh. That was fun.


	14. Family

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mothers always know best.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Leia so much, you guys have no idea.

Leia stood on the tarmac, Luke beside her, as the Millennium Falcon made its landing. If she was being honest, she had not expect the team to make such a speedy return, and she feared the worst because of it. Had Rey failed to bring Ben home, as Han had? They had surely faced each other, she could sense that much.

Finn had a disgruntled expression as he stomped down the ramp, Poe following closely after. They were alive and well enough, she decided, and they didn’t have the faces of men who had lost a friend. Rey survived the encounter with her son, she could assume.

The young woman then descended the ramp, her gate somewhat strained, a slight limp to her steps. Leia was instantly concerned, though she should have expected injuries. Still, she sighed. Everyone was alive, and that was what mattered. Then Rey turned her head up into the ship, barking back at someone.

“Hurry it up, _Matt.”_

There was a string of indistinct grumbles that followed that, and a gangling man exited the Falcon. He was graced with a sharp nose, sharper eyes, and an unsettling mess of blond hair atop his head that contrasted too much with his dark brows.

Luke chortled, and when she shot a glare up at him, he smothered his mouth with his hand, unapologetic.

“Did he actually think I would buy that? How stupid does he think I am?” she hissed, more to herself than Luke, before storming forward.

Rey tried to keep a neutral face as Leia approached. “General, this is Matt, a First Order Radar Technician. We rescued--”

Leia frowned at Rey, shutting her up immediately, before stopping before _Matt,_ halting him in his tracks. The man stared down at her with wide, frightened eyes, and she realized he was quite tall, towering over a foot above her. That didn’t deter her from swiftly shooting a hand up to grab one of his enormous ears and yanking him down to her level.

_“Oww! Ma--”_

“Suck it up, Ben.”

She swatted the wig from his head, and lovely black locks spilled out, long enough to brush his shoulders and curtain his narrow face.

Leia had too many questions for him, and half the mind to bend him over her knee, regardless of his age, but then something caught her eye. There was a suspiciously placed smear of red-violet blooming just below the ear she didn’t have in her clutches, and she glanced at Rey, who had stumbled off the Falcon with stiff strides.

It didn’t take a general to connect the dots.

“What did you do to that poor girl?” she seethed.

* * *

Kylo was tempted to answer with a question of his own, _what haven’t I done to her?_

That didn’t seem like the wisest course of action, however, and so he cleared his throat in an attempt to hide his embarrassment.

“Ma, wouldn’t you rather talk about something less awkward? Like how I killed dad, or something--”

She pinched his cheek hard enough to draw tears from his eyes. He blinked them back. “Oh, I haven’t forgotten about that.”

He was momentarily relieved. He had managed to change the subject. Kylo was certain that his mother must have been more angry about his father’s death than what he and Rey had done--several times over during the long flight back--in the Falcon.

He was, to his surprise, wrong.

“Don’t try to change the subject, Ben.” He cringed at the use of his old name. “Rey is a very sweet young lady, and I don’t care how far into the dark side you get, I did not raise my boy to be a...a _creep.”_

He did his best to meet her hard gaze evenly. His ears were on fire, meaning his flush had spread across his face, but he still managed to choke out, “It was consensual, Ma. I’m not a creep.”

Rey squeaked, and her embarrassment blended with his.

He watched his mother turn sharply to Rey. “I told you to slap his hands away, if you needed to.”

Kylo couldn’t help but to interject. “You told my force-bond girlfriend to not have sex with me?”

“Don’t you take that tone with me!” she retorted, glare back on him, her fingers clamping tighter on his earlobe. “You’ve done a lot of bad things, and I was hoping to avoid adding premarital sex to the list.”

“Oh _please,”_ he griped. “I know you and dad had to have a shotgun wedding. I’ve seen the holovids, and you had an awfully loose dress on, now, didn’t you? I wonder why you needed to do that, huh?”

Kylo was amazed she didn’t tear his ear off and slap him in the face with it, though it was due to Luke’s timely interruption. His uncle covered her hand with his, and she released Kylo, allowing him to return to his full height. He rolled his neck back and forth to alleviate the crick that had formed from being in such an uncomfortable position.

“Leia,” his uncle gently said, “I told you this was a likely outcome. You shouldn’t be surprised.”

Kylo huffed, rubbing his sore ear. Then he had a mechanical finger pointed in his face, a furious Luke Skywalker behind it.

“As for _you,_ you little shit,” he snarled, “You’ve made me so pissed I’m going to break my non-violence oath.”

The punch he sent towards Kylo leveled him completely. He stumbled a step, before falling onto his backside, clutching his throbbing cheek, and he stared up at his uncle, stunned.

Luke was already back to his morosely enlightened self, however, and another blow didn’t come. Instead, his uncle patted his head with the hand still made of flesh and bone.

“Don’t fuck anything else up, kid. I’ll try to convince the the Resistance council not to skewer you...because frankly, my choices in Jedi apprentices are rather slim, and I’m pretty sure you and Rey will pump out a few overly dramatic, force-sensitive brats for me to train.”

Kylo flopped flat on the tarmac, stretching his arms out. _I hate my family._

His mother and uncle promptly left, and he glowered at the sky. Poe appeared over his head.

“So, I see where you get the whole torture-thing from.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thanks for the wonderful responses to this ridiculous fic. Some of you have been with me from the start, and others have joined me along the way, and I love all of you. Because you have to be an amazing person to put up with this shit, my god. This isn't the last chapter, but we're reaching the end. Probably.
> 
> I don't know why, but I thought it would be the funniest thing for Kylo to call his mom 'Ma.'


	15. Stipulations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finn wants to know what the deal is. Leia is very much done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SO SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING SOONER, I HAVE NO EXCUSES.

Rey sighed, settling into a chair across from Finn and Poe in the mess hall. Kylo was sulking in her quarters, embarrassed that his mother had interrogated him about his sex life in front of everyone. Admittedly, it was probably for the best that he stay out of sight for the moment, until the Resistance decided what they were going to do with him. Most of the pilots and ground soldiers didn’t recognize his face, though his mask they would have known, but despite that, Rey had the feeling he would find a reason to cause a ruckus. He was touchy about the strangest things.

She took a sip of caf, favoring her warm mug over the strained expression on Finn’s face. She knew what his questions were before he could voice them.

“I think you owe us an explanation,” he said at last.

She nodded her head, weary. “I know.”

She took another sip, before setting her mug down onto her tray, mentally preparing herself for the worst.

Finn struggled, not sure where to start. “What did he say to--” he shook his head, trying again. “If you were training with Master Skywalker, how...why him?”

Rey exhaled. “It’s a bit complicated. I’m not sure I can explain our connection in a way that you’d understand.”

When Finn scowled, arms folding over his chest, Poe continued for him. “Try us. We’re smarter than we look.”

She paused, and suddenly Kylo was swimming in her thoughts. _You’re talking about me. Where are you?_

Rey frowned. _I thought you didn’t care what people thought about you. You said the_ rebellious stormtrooper _and_ slutty pilot _could say what they wanted, it wasn’t going to change anything._

_I don’t like people talking about me when I’m not there to defend myself._

She rolled her eyes. So, he _did_ care what people thought. Still, she relented, telling him they were in the mess hall, if he was really so desperate to see her friends. He scoffed at that, but she sensed his steady approach.

A hand was suddenly in her face, jolting her as it waved.

“Hello? You in there? Stop making faces and start talking.” Finn said, his tone impatient.

Rey laughed, despite herself, shaking her head. “Sorry. He’s surprisingly sensitive. He doesn’t like being talked about.”

“He knows that we’re talking about him?” Poe asked.

Finn shuddered. “That’s just creepy. He’s creepier than I thought. My god, that’s how you’ve been talking, isn’t it? He can’t do normal conversations, so he just talks directly into your head, like a creepy weirdo.”

Rey shrugged. “I told you it was hard to explain. It’s like our minds are bonded through the force. He’s been in my head since I started my training with Master Luke, and instead of getting information about my location, or trying to bring me to the dark side, he decided to flirt. Very badly, most of the time.”

“You’re making excuses for him,” Finn accused incredulously. “I can’t believe this! Well, he deserves an award then, for not hunting you down like a deranged animal, is that it? ‘You’re not as evil as we thought you were’ on a shiny, golden medal? How does that sound?”

Rey knew he was right, but she couldn’t help feeling a little defensive. “I’m not saying he’s perfect, or even that he’s a good person, but he could have caused serious damage to the Resistance, to the last of the Jedi, or to me. But he didn’t.”

“How does it work?” Poe interjected before Finn could make another snarky comment.

She didn’t get the chance to respond. Kylo appeared behind her, and both men seated at the table blinked up at him.

“To put it in a way a pilot could understand, it’s like having a comm in your head with a private signal.”

“Stop looming,” she scolded without turning towards him. “You’re not scaring anyone.”

“Huh,” Poe replied thoughtfully. “And any distance apart doesn’t matter?”

“Nope,” he answered with a flat tone, taking the seat beside her.

Under the table, his hand reached for hers, lacing their fingers together. She gave a small smile, bringing their joined hands up to rest on her lap. It was a nice sort of intimacy that she had never experienced before, and though they had spent hours tangled together, the act of holding hands embarrassed her more. Even if it was under the table, this was a public declaration of affection. He squeezed her fingers.

She nudged her breakfast tray towards him, and he picked at her untouched sweet bun with his free hand.

“Ew, you guys are so gross,” Finn complained.

Rey sensed Kylo tense at this accusation, but she squeezed his hand back. _Calm down._

To her amazement, he did. It must have been the excessive amount of sex they had been having.

“So,” Poe drawled at last, “what brought you two lovebirds together?”

Rey snickered at the grimace Kylo made.

* * *

 Kylo couldn’t deny it. When his mother summoned him to her personal apartments after a whole week of ignoring him, he was a little nervous. He knew Rey had been ordered to keep a close eye on him, she was trusted to stop him from running off or doing something... _destructive_. She had told him as much.

Kylo wasn’t offended by it. The Resistance should have, by all rights, been keeping him in a cell. Not that he was going to pull something.

Rey had helped him ready himself, sensing his anxiety, and he had sat for a solid ten minutes as she combed his thick hair. It hadn’t been tangled, but the sensation of the comb’s teeth as it slowly raked along his skull was soothing. She had teased him relentlessly when he started purring.

Now, however, standing outside the General’s rooms, his uneasiness returned. His mother opened the door before he could run off.

The only reason she had to speak to him was because his fate must have been decided. That was reason enough for him to be fearful, but she was annoyed by his trepidation, and he was quickly tugged inside by his forearm.

“Stop lollygagging, Ben,” she chastised, and he stumbled in, an awkward jumble of long limbs.

“You had better thank your uncle, because it’s thanks to him your hide isn’t getting flayed.”

Kylo gawked down at her. “I’m not being executed?”

“You’re not even going to be imprisoned,” she informed him with a terse voice. “Obviously, we’ll be keeping a tight leash on you, but thanks to my brother, you’re more or less a free man.”

Kylo swallowed, his throat tied in a giant knot. Though he felt some relief at this news, he knew that there had to be a catch. While the Resistance was more forgiving than The First Order ever would be, he knew he deserved punishment. That he was not getting any meant they wanted something in return for his relative freedom.

“There are, of course, a few stipulations.”

He nodded, unsurprised.

“First and foremost, we need information. On everything and anything. I don’t care if it’s the smallest, stupidest detail about maintenance schedules, we need it all. And you’ll start spilling as soon as we’re done here.”

This was not a condition that shocked him, and Kylo was perfectly willing to give them the information they wanted.

His mother continued. “After that, you’re going to help Rey and Luke bring Snoke down. I don’t care if you don’t agree with your uncle’s theology, you’re going to work together. If you back out or turn sides again, the decision to not execute you will change. This is non-negotiable.”

Again, Kylo had expected this. He inclined his head to show his understanding.

A flash of hope crossed her eyes, a small, optimistic smile curling her lips upward. It was gone in a moment, and Kylo straightened his back. There was more, and it seemed she disliked this condition most of all.

When she turned to seat herself, her legs crossed and arms folded. He followed her to take a seat opposite.

His mother was hesitant. “When you’ve done all this, and the war is over, you’re going to help your uncle rebuild the Jedi order,” she paused, before forcing the rest of her sentence through her teeth, “by contributing to the population of force-sensitives.”

He stared at her. “Ma, you must be joking,” he breathed.

“Not at all,” she assured him, not hiding her displeasure.

He ran a hand through his hair, staring with wide eyes at his feet. “I can’t believe he was being serious. Is Uncle Luke actually stupid? What could possibly make him think that me passing on my genes is a good idea? That I should be a parent? That I should be anywhere _near_ children?”

“It’s those genes of yours that are keeping you alive, Ben.”

Groaning, he scrubbed his face with both hands. “This is completely idiotic.”

“Don’t complain to me, I’m entirely against this plan of his. There’s no way I’m ready to be a grandma yet.”

Kylo moaned again, slumping in his chair, his legs fully outstretched.

He wondered how long he could put off talking to Rey about this. For a moment, he wished he could just die in the fight against Snoke, and avoid the conversation altogether.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It still amazes me the responses I get to this story. You guys are the best! I'm not sure how funny this chapter is, but I couldn't exactly continue without some plot. And it took me a few days to know exactly what I wanted to happen.


	16. Misunderstandings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey is livid, and decides to approach Luke. The encounter does not go according to plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I promised, another chapter! :)

Rey paced her quarters, breathing heavily. Kylo was meekly slumped on her bunk, eyes drawn to the floor, his hands clasped together on his lap. She raked clawed fingers through her hair, pulling long strands from her buns. It seemed he was awaiting her response.

“This is ridiculous!” she finally managed to say.

“I agree--”

She held a hand up, still taking long strides. “Don’t talk right now.”

Rey is certain she had never been so angry with her master before. It was one thing for the Resistance to expect something of Kylo, but for her to be dragged into it was another thing entirely. She had to shut her eyes and slowly exhale.

She had assured him on the Finalizer that they would sort out his situation when they returned to the Resistance base. At the time, however, Rey had never imagined Luke would volunteer them for a mission to pop out a whole new generation of padawan for him to train.

It was safe to say that was the last thing she had imagined. Especially considering the refresher course he had given her in safe sex. She pulled a face at the memory.

She turned roughly back to Kylo, fully intending to pry more from him about his interaction with General Organa, but when she saw the pathetic expression on his face, she paused. The red of his cheeks spread to his ears, his lips pressed in a line, his eyes refused to look at her. If she was enraged, he was utterly embarrassed, and she felt a small touch of guilt.

“I’m not angry with you,” she mumbled, letting her shoulders slump.

He nodded, twiddling his thumbs.

She gave a dismayed smile he couldn’t see, before nudging his knees apart to step between them and leaning over to kiss the crown of his head. Rey snickered when his ears became impossibly redder, his hands wrapping around her waist.

He tipped his face up, finally raising his gaze to hers. Kylo pouted slightly, his lower lip jutting out in just the right way. She dropped her arms around his neck, letting them fall down his back, and he met her halfway when she lowered her face to his. She grinned against his mouth, warm and persuasive as it was, and when he tried to pull her towards the bed, she was sorely tempted to let him.

“Later,” she promised into his open mouth.

He hummed back at her, his tone accepting, but his hand slid from her waist to grab her backside.

“I mean it!” she laughed, swatting his hand away. “Later.”

“We’ll figure out what to do,” he vowed, his voice a pleasant rumble. There was an unsaid _after_ tacked to the end of his promise.

“Yes, we will,” she replied firmly, before asking, “Do you want to watch me rip Master Luke a new one?”

He grunted, kissing her again, perhaps a bit hungrier than he had a moment previous. “Fuck, yeah I do.”

* * *

Rey doesn’t even try to keep her voice down. Luke was outside, meditating in a courtyard of sorts, having found a small patch of grass to commune with, or do whatever it was he did.

“Hey!” she barked, startling a small group of unsuspecting pilots that had been speaking in low tones to the side. They watched as she stomped towards Luke, Kylo a shadow to her every step. “Master Shit-Head!”

Kylo barely contained his laughter at this, and had to press his knuckles into his mouth to seal it in. His uncle sputtered up at Rey, astounded by the unexpected name-calling. The pilots gaped at her as well, but she was hardly one to hold back for the sake of an audience.

“Just who do you think you are, making plans for my uterus?” She snapped, standing over him with her hands at her hips.

She really didn’t know how to keep her voice down. Kylo didn’t care.

“Rey--”

She reached down to clench at her Master’s robes, yanking him upward with a surprising amount of strength. Kylo knew she was furious, and had every right to be, but he felt yearning for her curl in his gut. She was so beautiful when she was angry.

“No one gets to decide if and when he plants some dark-haired, melodramatic baby in me but _me!_ And him, a bit, but mostly  _me."_

Kylo stood still, before sending her a quiet question, barely a brush in her mind. _When?_

She shot a glance at him from the corner of her eye, suddenly flustered. _Well, yeah...I never said I didn’t want kids. Eventually._

If his uncle sensed their brief exchange, he said nothing about it. “No one ever said anything about you two having kids right now. There’s not too much of a time limit on that one, the counsel just needed a reason besides taking down the First Order to keep Ben around. I’m pretty sure if he manages to meet the first two conditions, they’ll forget about the last one.”

Rey deflated slightly, releasing the front of his robes. “Oh.”

Kylo was more preoccupied by what she had said. She wanted kids. Eventually. He had never truly considered it, it had never even crossed his mind before his mother brought it up, but it made sense that she would desire a family. Unexpected panic fluttered in his chest, beating violently in a way that made his vision temporarily blur.

“I figured it would happen either way,” Luke continued wisely, stroking his beard. He added with a half-whisper for Rey’s benefit, “The Solo boys are well known for having good aim.”

“Please stop,” she uttered, squirming under her master’s knowing look.

“What did you call me again?” Luke mused, his humor plain. “Master Shit-Head?”

Rey straightened her back. “Well, okay. I think we’re done here.”

Kylo felt her grab his hand and swiftly lead him away. Completely against his will, he made a low whine in the back of his throat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so angry with myself. I keep promising myself that I'll start working towards the end of the fic, but I keep getting new ideas.
> 
> BUT I ALSO HAVE IDEAS FOR NEW FICS OMG. I really want to tackle a modern AU.
> 
> Anyway...thanks, as always, for all the kudos/comments/general love. You guys are the best!


	17. Solace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kylo finds unfamiliar peace at the Resistance base, and knows he owes it to Rey. Unfortunately, it can't last forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't actually plan on it, but there is smut in this chapter. NSFW content ahead, ye be warned. Now I'm a pirate, I guess.

The information Kylo had shared with the Resistance had proven useful. After compiling the data he surrendered over long hours to a group of dedicated, sleep-deprived analysts, a plan to bring down Supreme Leader Snoke and his organization quickly formed. It was strange for him to see how the Resistance operated, when compared to the swift, ultimately efficient First Order. He had to grudgingly admit that even if the Resistance forces were a bit less organized, a lot more human, they had a certain flexibility and cunning that the First Order lacked.

Stranger than that, however, was how quickly his uncle invited Kylo to join him and Rey in their daily meditations and spars. He had resisted at first, not worthy to join them, and not entirely certain he should want to.

Rey was patient when she tried, and it took her a week to convince him to follow her to the quiet spaces she trained with Luke in. His uncle had been a little surprised to see him standing behind Rey, but he was quick to recover and said nothing of his being there. Kylo was sure he had his suspicions on his reasons for following Rey.

He fell into an easy pattern of waking each morning to Rey’s hair in his face, holding her until she woke, following her into the ‘fresher, and then meeting with Luke to meditate. It only took a few days for Luke to back away from the physical aspects of her training, claiming that he was by no means a young man anymore, and since they were both so _active,_ it was only right they put forth equal energy to her lightsaber techniques.

As embarrassed as his uncle’s quips made him, Kylo readily accepted his new duties to help her familiarize herself better with lightsaber fighting. He had wanted this since the day he had met her. The offer he had made over a year back, clashing amongst swirling eddies of snow and biting wind, seemed so long ago. He was a different man than the one who had offered to become her teacher.

It was amusing to think this new life of his had all started with the desire to get into her pants.

Which he _did._ Frequently. As often as possible, if he was honest.

Rey, who was meditating beside him, slapped Kylo’s shoulder with a scolding laugh. “Knock that off. I’m trying to concentrate over here.”

His uncle made a disgruntled sound off to the side, having learned that breaking them apart now was impossible. Kylo almost felt guilty that his uncle so often had to bear witness to their behavior. Not guilty enough to stop, though.

“Maybe you should try a bit harder,” he tilted towards her with a slow whisper.

Her eyes flashed at him, instantly frustrated and aroused by his tone. He wriggled his eyebrows at her, and then her face was brightly beaming at him. She snickered as she shoved him.

“I mean it. Be good.”

“I could show you what’s good,” he pronounced each word into the shell of her ear.

She shivered visibly, her tongue wetting her lips.

His uncle promptly stood. Though he left without voicing a single complaint, the look he gave them clearly said, _why can’t you two get this out of your systems already?_

“Wait, Master--” Rey called after him, but Luke was already gone.

She made an exasperated grumble, before smacking him again. “You chased him off again, like I knew you would. That’s why I told you to stop.”

Kylo couldn’t make himself care.

“Clearly, your skills in premonition are growing,” he mumbled, bringing her closer. “You probably know what I’m going to do next, then.”

“Oh, shut up,” she muttered, but she curled his hair away from his ears--he had no idea what it was about them that she liked so much--and was pressing her mouth to his skin.

They were essentially alone, but that didn’t change the fact they were in a public area, and there was a chance of someone walking through, or his uncle returning. He hissed, turning his face towards her when she pawed at his crotch, forcefully capturing her lips. She sighed into his mouth, her slick tongue prodding.

Her voice stole into his mind with a blunt promise. _I’m going to ride you. Right now._

He nodded, already yanking her trousers down. She pulled his own pants over his thighs but not fully off, and with little prelude he wrenched her undergarment to the side so she could sink onto him with a stuttering moan.

It was awkward, his backside in the grass but the rest of him still dressed, while her legs were bare and her top clothed. He was tempted to redress them both and relocate to a more private place so he could strip her completely, but Kylo was quickly distracted by the jolting rhythm of her narrow hips and the slick heat of her pink folds.

_Faster,_ he begged, unable to keep himself from jerking upwards into her.

It was difficult to keep himself quiet, but nearly impossible to silence her. He had to swallow her broken cries as much as he could, the rest escaping to fill the small courtyard.

He was close to finishing when she ordered, _Let me come first._

It was an impractical request, but he swallowed with a sharp incline of his head, eyes clamping shut, arms tightening around her torso. She was swiveling her hips in faltering eights, desperate for the right friction, and he impatiently reached between them to stroke at her clit.

The moment she saw stars, he rolled his hips into her, his entire body seizing as he found release.

She laughed breathlessly, kissing his nose.

“You’re right,” she managed to say. “That was good.”

* * *

The momentary solace she found with Kylo on base could not last long, and Rey knew that. Plans were made and she felt as if she was being swept away. As confident as she wanted to be, she was concerned about facing the creature that had haunted Kylo for so many years.

Her worries couldn’t slow progress, however, and as she sat in the cockpit of the Millennium Falcon, it occurred to her that she could be flying right to her death. She glanced to the man beside her, though, and despite his unease, she tried to gather strength for what was to come.

They were going to defeat Snoke, regardless of the cost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, next chapter will be a return to the plot. Also, humor. Hopefully.
> 
> As always, I want to thank all my lovely readers for the kudos/comments/general love. You're all amazing. :)


	18. Plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> General Hux isn't sure he can believe Kylo Ren didn't leave the First Order to get laid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, here we go. The start of the final arc. Probably.

“This plan is stupid,” Kylo intoned, his arms crossed over his chest. He turned to Master Luke with an accusatory tone. “Why do all of your plans entail giving yourself up to the enemy? Why did my mother even let you get this involved with the planning process?”

“My plans have yet to ever fail,” he replied. “No one ever expects you to give yourself up, especially if you’ve already done it before. It always works. Don’t start questioning my methods now.”

Rey sighed. They had been arguing about this for hours now, and it wouldn’t be long before they left hyperspace. They didn’t have the time to be changing their plans now, even if she did, in part, agree with Kylo. It felt reckless to just stomp onto the First Order’s main base, especially when Kylo was a turncoat and her face was known.

Admittedly, she had a feeling this Supreme Leader Snoke would want to see to them personally. Kylo had betrayed his teachings, she was a source of possible, unknown power, and Master Luke was the last Jedi. Master Luke wasn’t wrong in thinking that they would be brought before Snoke eventually, but Rey knew that Kylo was, understandably, concerned about who their escort would be.

General Hux, should he be the one to intercept their ship, would not be pleased to see them, if the way they had parted was anything to go by. Captain Phasma would perhaps be more fearsome, as an efficient soldier who lacked the distraction of rage.

“Your methods are completely ridiculous,” Kylo retorted. “They may have worked back in the times of the Empire, but the First Order will not be deceived so easily. Snoke will know our intentions before we get anywhere close to his chambers.”

“It doesn’t matter if he sees it coming,” Master Luke argued. “He will have us brought before him either way.”

“It’s completely insane to keep doing the same things over and over again. So long as we get to Snoke before the fleet of X-wings start their aerial attack--”

Rey glared at them both. “It’s a bit late to be fighting about this now,” she snapped.

They both looked a bit surprised by her interjection.

She continued when they remained silent. “We’re less than an hour away. At this point, we should be preparing ourselves.”

“Fine,” he grudgingly agreed. “If we have to give ourselves up, then I’m amending the plan. A bit.”

She watched as he stood and followed him with her eyes as he disappeared into the crew quarters. Through their bond, she got a sense for what he was thinking, and had to put her foot down.

“No more disguises! Matt the Radar Technician is not needed here!”

His voice was almost a whine. “I _know.”_

* * *

It was unusual, to dress himself in the long, black robes once again. Though it had only been weeks since he had worn them, he felt out of place in the stuffy, dark layers. He emerged from the crew quarters awkwardly, feeling uncertain for a few moments. Kylo forced himself to take confident strides.

Rey and his uncle both stared, pausing their conversation. They had not expected him to return in his old clothes.

“Let me explain,” he said defensively, lifting his hands in surrender. “I have an idea.”

His uncle hesitated before at last giving in. “Go on.”

Kylo slowly exhaled. “Okay. So, either way we need to get into Snoke’s chambers before the X-wings strike. It will go much smoother for us if we aren’t beaten bloody beforehand. If I’m able to convince the First Order that my betrayal was a ploy to capture you and Rey, we should be able to get by relatively unharmed.”

Rey frowned slightly, approaching him. “From what you’ve told me about General Hux, I doubt he’d buy it.”

“Hux isn’t as smart as I made him sound,” he replied, tipping her chin up with a gloved hand. Perhaps being back in his old clothing had rekindled a sense of impulsiveness in him. His urge to kiss her was denied, however, by a quick flick of his uncle’s wrist as he grabbed Kylo’s hand and yanked it from Rey's jaw.

“We don’t have time for that,” he ground out through grit teeth.

 _When we get back,_ Rey promised. _You can kiss me all you want when we get back._

He met her gaze. _I will. I’ll keep you in bed for an entire week._

She grinned up at him. _You better._

“Enough!” Luke cried, exasperated. “I know what you two are doing, and we have a mission. Get your heads out the gutter.”

Rey bit her lower lip, and seeing it caught between her teeth made Kylo want to lean down and capture them for himself more. By the way her eyes sparkled at him, she knew this.

“We’re sorry, Master,” Rey uttered, though there was no hiding her mirth. “We’ll be good.”

“Yeah,” he mumbled darkly, “I’ve heard that one before.”

* * *

As soon as the Millennium Falcon was caught in the space station’s tractor beam, General Hux was notified. Their current center of operations was a tribute to the fallen Empire and the iconic Death Star, and though Hux had mixed feelings about using an older design for their new base, it was quite the monument. Nothing would make up for the loss of Starkiller though, he thought resentfully.

Somehow, he knew Kylo Ren would be aboard the old freighter, and petty as it was, Hux wanted to be there to boast over the ease of his capture. After what that man-child had done to him, he felt somewhat justified in his desire to gloat.

His long coat, clinging to his shoulders, swung about him as he made his way to the hangar. Hux hoped he had the chance to knock Kylo Ren off his feet--though he was no knight, he _did_ know how to throw a punch--he imagined the satisfying crunch of Kylo’s nose as his fist crushed it. His chest heaved as he pictured it so clearly in his mind.

He hoped to hell that the scavenger girl had been a good lay, because Hux had every intention to make Kylo Ren’s pathetic life utterly miserable, and through the long hours of torture, he was going to need at least one good memory to retain what little sanity he possessed.

It was just his luck that nothing went as he planned. Hux entered the hangar just in time to see Kylo Ren descending the Millennium Falcon’s onramp, his scavenger tramp and an old man in tow. Kylo may have lacked his mask, but he still wore a face of confidence.

“General Hux,” he greeted in a calm, assured voice. As if nothing had happened.

Hux felt his blood-pressure rise at the man’s composed expression. His jaw tightened.

“Kylo Ren,” he growled back. “It was incredibly stupid of you--”

“The hostilities are unnecessary, General,” he interrupted with an even tone. “As you can see, I return bearing gifts for Supreme Leader Snoke. I have captured Skywalker, and his Jedi apprentice is a nice perk.”

Hux took a quick look-over of the glaring scavenger, and it was almost believable.

“You mean to tell me that you didn’t just betray the First Order for a good fuck?” he paused. “How dumb do you think I am?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh I feel like this fic isn't as funny as it used to be. I have plans for Snoke though, so you guys should have something to look forward to.
> 
> As always, thank you guys so much for all the comments/kudos/general love. You're all the best!


	19. Petty Revenge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux is more sure than ever that he deserves a raise. Snoke is intrigued by Rey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We finally meet Snoke. I'm not sure that I've gotten his character quite right, but since this isn't a very serious fic...I'll just do my best. I had a lot of fun writing this chapter.

Kylo had to bite his tongue to keep from voicing his snarky response to Hux’s question. He swallowed as he glanced over his shoulder at Rey, who was doing her damnedest to look betrayed. She was quite the actress, he couldn’t deny that.

“If you recall, General,” he intoned, straightening his back, “no real harm ever came to you or any Stormtrooper as we left the Finalizer.”

The General’s glare narrowed darkly. “It was all an elaborate scheme then? Is that really what you’re saying?”

“I’m glad we have an understanding,” Kylo replied. “Now, if you excuse me, I’m sure Supreme Leader Snoke is anxious to meet with me and my new apprentice, as well as the Jedi scum.”

General Hux gave him a long, scrutinizing stare. It was best that he brush it off, he knew; that would be more convincing than anything he said. He and Hux had never been on the best of terms, and acting friendly now would only raise suspicions further. Kylo started to march away, each step self-assured. He had to trust that Hux would allow his uncle and Rey to follow him.

“Wait a moment,” Hux stopped them.

Kylo turned to find the General with a gloved hand clutching Rey’s throat. It was a surprisingly gentle touch however, and he turned her face either way to inspect her closer, his expression curious. Rey looked about ready to snap her teeth at his fingers for touching her, the rage that widened her eyes very real.

 _Don’t,_ he warned her.

Her tone was abrasive. _I’m not. But I doubt you could do anything to stop me._

“I think I might understand what it is you find so attractive about your desert rat,” Hux finally said, satisfied with his examination. “I wouldn’t mind spending some time with her, if you ever manage to tame her properly.”

Kylo saw red. His hands itched to take up his lightsaber, but before he could act, Rey took the situation into her own hands. She tore herself away from General Hux, gathered all the saliva in her mouth and spit directly in his perfectly groomed face. The spittle, which had landed just below his eye, slowly streaked down his cheek.

It was probably for the best, because Kylo might have killed him otherwise.

Hux sputtered, the connection between his mind and mouth temporarily lost. Kylo rushed back to where they stood, pushing both his uncle and Rey forward from behind before they could cause more damage.

He had a mildly panicked look on his face. Kylo suspected no one had ever dared spit at him before, and it was difficult to not give a mocking laugh.

“You’re fine,” Kylo told him with a dry tone, scurrying past. “I’m sure you have a handkerchief somewhere on your person.”

* * *

“You two are going to be the death of me,” Master Luke groused as they made their way down a long, mercifully empty hall.

Kylo was still pushing her forward, as he had for the past few minutes.

“Talk to Miss Loogie over here,” Kylo grumbled back. “That was not a part of any plan I made.”

“I’m not apologizing,” Rey scoffed. “That bastard deserved it.”

Master Luke was not appeased by her comment. “It doesn’t matter if he deserved it, it could have jeopardized our mission. We have things to accomplish, and spitting in the faces of easily angered generals is not one of them.”

“I’m still not apologizing,” Rey repeated with force.

“Enough!” Kylo hissed, pushing between them to walk in front. “You two need to actually look like prisoners. There’s surveillance everywhere, and I have no doubt Hux is watching our every move, especially now that _someone’s_ pissed him off.”

“Don’t pretend you didn’t want to kill him,” Rey mumbled. “I probably saved that asshole’s life.”

She knew she was right by his insufferable silence. Still, she took a deep breath and continued forward. Despite how offended that General had been by what she did, he must have made it known that they posed no threat. Their passage through the winding halls of the space station went by uneventfully.

Eventually, they reached what must have been their destination. They quietly ascended in an elevator that stopped on only one floor, an observatory of sorts. The door slid open to a vast, poorly lit room.

“Wow, deja vu,” Master Luke muttered, taking in the throne and the cloaked being that occupied it. “This is like the battle over Endor all over again.”

Rey didn’t know what he meant, but she held her tongue. While Master Luke was unbothered by it, and Kylo must have anticipated it, a dark presence brushed over her entire form, giving her chills. It took a feat of strength and self-control to not cower under the weighted gaze of Snoke.

“Kylo Ren,” Snoke slowly rasped, the expression on his ancient, marred face giving no hint to how he felt. “The prodigal son returns. With friends.”

Kylo took long strides forward, lowering to one knee. “Supreme Leader, I have brought Skywalker, as well as the scavenger--”

“I know who they are,” Snoke interrupted, betraying his own impatience. He stood abruptly, towering over Kylo while he remained kneeling. “I see you have gone to great lengths to complete this task.”

“Yes, my master.”

* * *

Snoke knew very well what Kylo Ren was trying to hide from him. Kylo Ren’s mind had been nurtured by him since infancy, and it belonged to him. It was impossible to conceal the attraction he felt for the scavenger girl. No, it was more than that. Every cell in Kylo Ren’s body screamed of his constant, unquenchable desire for her, every moment of every day. And in every position.

It was nauseating to see his head so clouded by lust. Embarrassingly human. Which, he wryly supposed, should not have surprised him. Kylo Ren was a young man who lacked restraint in almost every manner. After circling his student, he returned to his seat, his fingers forming a steeple in his thoughtfulness.

At length, he sighed. “Tell me, Kylo Ren, are you planning to continue sleeping with her, even after she becomes your apprentice?”

The girl, startled by the question, squeaked.

Snoke, amused by her prudishness, glanced past Kylo Ren to regard her. “There is no need for you to act so modest, child. From what I’ve seen in his head, you two have been _very_ busy.”

Instead of protesting further, she glowered at Kylo Ren. Snoke had a good feeling about this girl.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you for the comments/kudos/general love! You guys gave me so much encouragement after the last chapter, and it really means a lot. :)


	20. Ganging Up on the Elderly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The battle against Snoke begins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hoooo boy. I haven't written a fight scene in a long time, so I might be a bit rusty. Bear with me!

Rey was glaring at him, and Kylo knew it. She sensed what he was doing, and though she must have understood his reasoning, Rey was displeased.

Still, he had no other options. Snoke knew his mind as if it were his own, and to prevent him from seeing what Kylo intended, it was necessary to create a...diversion. If Snoke wanted to see just what he had been up to in the past few weeks, then fine. He would show him.

He tried to be a bit subtle about projecting the intimate moments he had shared with Rey, hoping that he appeared to be consumed with her rather than intentionally displaying each touch and breathy gasp. He could only pray that Rey wouldn’t react so negatively that Snoke realized what he was doing.

Thankfully, Snoke seemed to buy it. Rey stood her ground, however mortified she was that their privacy had been compromised, and Kylo couldn’t have been more proud.

“Come forward,” Snoke beckoned his guests.

Though his master was pleased to have Luke Skywalker in his clutches at last, he was an afterthought compared to Rey, whom Snoke studied with rapt fascination. Rey knew that his attention was on her, and held her head high, pushing past her own embarrassment.

“She is quite strong in the force, my apprentice,” he addressed Kylo with pursed lips, “but I have some concerns in your choice of mate.”

Kylo cringed. He wasn’t sure how he was supposed to feel about the use of the term _mate_ when regarding Rey, but it left an acrid taste in his mouth. It implied that their relationship was strictly animalistic, and he didn’t like it. It was wrong. He wanted to defend himself, defend them both, but this was neither the time nor place.

“Master?” he inquired, dreading what Snoke had to say.

“She has spent too many years on the brink of starvation. Her hips are too narrow, her chest underdeveloped.”

Kylo bit the inside of his cheek to keep from retorting. Though he wouldn’t have minded if she was a bit fuller, he had accustomed himself to the way her slim body fit against him, to the small swell of her breast in his palm. He clenched and unclenched his fists, driven mad by his inability to argue with Snoke without giving himself away.

“I fail to see how that is relevant, Master,” Kylo managed to reply.

Snoke sneered back at him. “You _wouldn’t,_ now, would you? You’ve been so busy you haven’t stopped to think about offspring.”

His uncle quietly spoke, giving words to just how Kylo felt. “Oh, no.”

 _How long do we have?_ her voice was venomous and instant.

_He’s going to hear--_

_How long do we have?_ she repeated sharply.

_Ten minutes, at least--_

_We can handle that._

Kylo was not given any choice in the matter. Before he could protest her decision, she yanked her lightsaber out from within his dark robes with the force. It shot out with astonishing speed and hit her palm with a slap that undoubtedly stung. His uncle did the same, though his motions were more resigned than enraged.

“You have let your guard down, Kylo Ren,” Snoke intoned, “Unless you are being exceedingly foolish.”

Sighing, Kylo retrieved his own lightsaber from his belt. “You made a mistake by bringing up the whole kid thing. She’s pretty touchy when it comes to her uterus.”

“I’m not touchy!” she snapped. “It’s not my fault men are just idiots!”

“Here we go,” his uncle muttered, gripping his lightsaber and igniting it, a powerful, green beam bursting from the hilt. He and Rey both followed suit, and it was a surreal experience, to oppose Snoke next to the last Jedi.

“So,” Snoke concluded, “you _are_ being foolish.”

Kylo flashed a grin, his red blade sparking to life. “Probably.”

The gesture threw Snoke off slightly, and the three of them rushed forward to take advantage of his surprise.

* * *

Rey was still seething, even after she had put her full energy into attacking Snoke.

“I can’t believe you showed this freak all _that,_ like you’re sharing some porn-vid with your prepubescent pals!” she growled at Kylo, even as they swung their sabers in tandem.

Snoke never revealed his own lightsaber, and Rey was beginning to doubt he utilized one. He instead relied solely on the force to defend himself. This decision of his seemed rather cocky to her, and it only made Rey more angry.

“Would you rather I let him figure out we were here to kill him?” he howled back, his hand darting away from where he held it at his chest to thrust the force forward.

Snoke stumbled back a few steps, but recovered with ease. Master Luke came flying down and from behind, his lightsaber a verdant blur as it swung for Snoke’s head. A grey hand jerked upward to stop the saber in its deadly path.

“Argue about this later!” Luke yelled. “If you hadn’t noticed, we’re trying to save the galaxy right now!”

With only one hand to defend against her and Kylo, they were able to veer through the invisible hold that had stilled their sabers. She swung at Snoke once more, and instead of doing the same, Kylo tugged their opponent towards her, giving her enough of an opening to sear the flesh of his arm.

It was only a graze, but Snoke hissed, more from fury than any pain he might have felt. His head wrenched to the side so he could glare at Kylo.

“You’re going to regret that, Kylo Ren,” he promised from between grit teeth.

Snoke’s long fingers jolted forward, a sudden shock of electricity streaming towards Rey. She heard Kylo cry out, but she managed to shift her lightsaber in time, preventing the lightning from hitting her. Still, the weight behind it was enough to send her flying back, even if it never struck her. She landed on her back with a grunt, the air knocked from her chest.

Rey sat up in time to see Master Luke and Kylo attacking, an interesting contrast of elegance and brute strength.

“You okay over there?” Kylo called, not sparing a moment to look at her from the corner of his eye.

She jumped to her feet. “I’m fine. Don’t think you can change the subject so easily!”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he swore with a curl of his lip.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The battle should conclude in the next chapter. Probably.
> 
> Thanks, as always, for all the comments/kudos/general love. :)


	21. Captive

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When General Hux is at his most vulnerable, most afraid, he is too easy to make fun of. Kylo and Rey can't help but to take advantage of that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY FOR SUCH A SLOW UPDATE! School has been hectic (you wouldn't believe how much you have to write when taking 3 english courses all at once) and I had a hard time starting this chapter off. Also, I may or may not have gotten distracted by another fic. I've shamelessly already pumped out 3000+ words for it. I am trash, and I know it.

However strong Supreme Leader Snoke may have been in the force, it could not fully compensate for the weakness of his body. Incapacitated, he lay on the cold durasteel floor, unable to put up any more of a fight. Three lightsabers pointed down towards him, a fierce balance of red, green, and blue.

Kylo’s chest heaved alongside theirs, the only sound in the room being their panting. Victory was...somehow understated.

He had always thought Snoke would be so much stronger, but it seemed all that power rested in his ability to manipulate. He let out a long breath of air, allowing his shoulders to slump, though not fully relax.

“You’re making such a big mistake, Kylo Ren,” Snoke narrowed his eyes at him, his tone ragged. “I could still make you powerful, if you give in to me. Turn on your friends, prove your worth. All can be forgiven.”

Rey promptly nudged him with her boot. “Why would anyone in their right mind join the side that lost?”

Snoke glared at her, and the sight was surreal. “I’m liking you less and less. I guess I shouldn’t be surprised a desert rat is unrefined, under-qualified, blinded by--”

Rey kicked him with a bit more force, a wide grin on her face. “People tend to say that.”

“What should we do with him now?” Kylo turned to his uncle, whose expression was grim but resolute. The Jedi avoided killing, even if it was an enemy.

A sudden rumble and the blaring shriek of alarms indicated the Resistance fleet had arrived at last, an answer to his question.

Luke lowered his weapon, returning it to his belt. “His fate will be the same as this battle station’s. There is no need for us to do any more than we already have.”

There was the squeak of boots sliding to a sudden stop, and a shrill cry of outrage burst from where the elevator was. “Supreme Leader!”

The trio, still standing over the fallen man, all turned. General Hux, it would seem, had decided to see just what they had been doing in the middle of an aerial strike, and what he found was not at all what he had anticipated.

Kylo huffed. _Well, this is awkward._

General Hux, surprised by the high pitch of his own voice, frowned, squaring his shoulders and clearing his throat. “What is the meaning of this?”

Rey sounded amazingly smug in his head. _You know, I bet a general would be somewhat crucial to their whole operation. He probably has some interesting information, too._

Kylo smirked. _Plus, it would really piss the bastard off, to be brought to the Resistance now._

Hux had been watching their wordless exchange, seen their face become increasingly pleased, and was understandably concerned when Rey took a step towards him.

“Obviously, we tricked you. Kylo was right, _General,”_ she drawled the title with a smirk, “you’re not that smart at all.”

The General’s back straightened to the point of it looking uncomfortable, and Kylo laughed out loud. He had waited long years to see Hux so rattled, and he was going to savor it for as long as possible.

He followed slowly behind Rey, each step a dangerous promise, and Hux stared at him with wide eyes.

“What do you think we should do with him?” Rey asked, casually tossing up her lightsaber hilt and then catching it.

“Well,” Kylo replied slowly, “I’m sure he has plenty of uses.”

Hux swallowed visibly. He knew the position he was in, and was not doing a very good job of hiding his fear.

“Maybe we should tie him and Snoke up in that stupid throne. They’re supposed to be good friends, right?”

Kylo sneered at the idea. “You know, I think they _are_ pretty good friends. I’m sure they’re good enough friends to hold each other as this station falls apart on their heads.”

Hux paled considerably, and Kylo could see in his face the desire to run. Rey must have sensed it too, because she caught his wrist before he could turn away and rush from the observatory.

“What was it you said earlier?” she asked the general, her features morphed into an image of pure innocence.

General Hux stuttered, astonished. “Wha--”

“That’s _right!”_ she exclaimed, feigning remembrance. “‘I wouldn’t mind spending some time with her, if you ever manage to tame her properly.’”

General Hux flushed, anxiously loosening his collar from his throat. “Clearly, I was out of line--”

Now that he was in danger, he was more than courteous, and Kylo was amused to no end. He crowded in closer, looking Hux in the eye to the point of unease.

“Are you flirting with her?” He droned, his gaze hard.

“What? No! Of course not--”

“I think he might be,” Rey confirmed with a sharp nod. “You heard him before, he thinks I’m cute.”

Hux’s voice cracked. “I never said anything of the sort!”

Finally, his uncle had enough. Really, the outburst was a long time coming.

“For fuck’s sake!” he roared, marching between them to break up the... _bullying,_ for lack of a better word. “You’re going to make a general piss himself. We’re leaving!”

Despite the fact that General Hux was quite obviously taller than Luke, his uncle decisively threw the man over his shoulder and stormed towards the elevator. Hux made an indignant sound in the back of his throat, clearly embarrassed.

“Keep up, brats! I’m not dying here.”

Kylo took one last glance back at Snoke to see him tied to his throne. A snicker escaped from between his lips.

* * *

The Fleet of X-Wing fighters had been swift and effective. Through the wailing of alarms, shouts could be heard as Stormtroopers made their escapes. Without General Hux at the helm, their only form of leadership came from Captain Phasma, whom, while a skilled soldier, was not fully prepared to lead the entirety of the First Order’s main force. She had called an evacuation, knowing that staging a counter-strike was moot. It was better to regroup.

Though she loathed to admit it, Captain Phasma knew the First Order was finished, and it was impossible to swallow their loss with dignity.

She stayed as long as possible, to be sure as many troopers got onto a safe transport as possible, before she, too, had no choice but to flee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully you guys got a kick out of bullying Hux. It was so much fun to do, once I got into the groove of this chapter.
> 
> I just want to say how much I really appreciate all the support I've gotten for this fic. It amazes me how many people are reading this silly thing. You guys are the best, and as always, thank you for the kudos/comments/general love. It means so much.


	22. Humiliation and Surrender

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> General Hux almost wished he had been left behind for dead. Almost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I'm planning to finish this fic in either the next chapter or the one that follows. We'll see.

Hux was not entirely sure how he managed to find himself sitting at a table in a stark, secure room, face to face with the infamous General Organa of the Resistance. The woman that had, in the generation of his father, served a rebellion that brought down the mighty Galactic Empire.

Well, that wasn’t entirely true. He knew exactly how he had wound up there.

Though Hux didn’t know how, he would exact his revenge on Kylo Ren.

It had been a horrible trip to the Resistance base, and it wasn’t entirely due to being on an ancient freighter that should have been retired decades back. The accommodations aboard left much to be desired, but what had irked him most was how the traitorous Kylo had bound him to a chess table, then promptly turned to his scavenger girl for some...heavy petting.

The girl, Rey, was hardly more generous than Kylo. She chucked a nutritional bar at his head, before innocently asking, _“Hungry, General Fuck-Face?”_ He had been, in fact, hungry, but the bar had ricocheted off his forehead, landing out of reach. In any case, he wouldn’t have been able to eat it with his hands tied around the table post.

So he had sat on the ground, head awkwardly ducked under the tabletop, his legs angled out, his hands bound on the other side of the post. The Jedi, not much better than Kylo or Rey, barked a short laugh at seeing him. Hux had been utterly humiliated.

More humiliating than that, perhaps, had been when Kylo had thrown him over his shoulder, made a snide comment on how light he was, then marched him off the Millennium Falcon, offering him up to the General with a devious grin.

“Don’t say I never got you anything, Ma,” he had said. _Ma._ To think Kylo Ren’s mother was General Organa.

Now, however, he glared back at the short woman. She was much more compact than he would have expected, especially with the new knowledge that Kylo was her son. He saw her son’s eyes on her face though, burning with a familiar ferocity.

General Organa pushed forward a tray. The Resistance meal she offered him was humble but hearty looking, consisting of a meat stew and bread roll that was sure to stick to his ribs. He thought of his wine collection with heavy remorse.

“Go ahead,” she insisted, expression flat. “I know it’s been over twenty-four hours since you’ve eaten.”

He pressed his lips together in a thin line. She was using a classic interrogation method, and Hux refused to fall for it.

“I’m fine, thank you.”

Only, he wasn’t. His stomach, too used to regular meals, decided that was the right moment to growl, erupting in the too-silent room. Mortified, he clenched his jaw, looking to the side. _That,_ he decided, was the most humiliating moment of his entire illustrious career.

She had the gall to laugh. “If I was going to poison you, I’d have done it already. Just eat.”

He wished the chair would swallow him up. When she slid an eating utensil towards him, he took it, refusing to meet her eye.

“Your son is a piece of shit,” he informed her, taking a bite of stew. It was salty and the sauce was rich. He tried to tell himself that he only liked the taste because he was so hungry.

“So’s your father,” she replied with ease.

“So was yours,” he snapped, looking up at her.

She smirked victoriously, one small battle won.

_Damn._

* * *

Supreme Leader Phasma--with no one to take command, she bore the title with some grief--was half tempted to dissolve the First Order. Snoke was gone, General Hux missing, presumed dead, and most of their forces had either perished on the space station or pulled a _Finn,_ as she was starting to call it. She didn’t have the manpower to hunt down the deserters. All that remained was the Finalizer.

When the Resistance made contact to request a summit, Phasma was almost relieved. Being Supreme Leader wasn’t as entertaining as she would have imagined, and if they were willing to negotiate for the lives of her men, then she was more than willing to yield. The Resistance had more power than she did, and though the fighter in her wanted to fight regardless of the odds, Phasma knew when she was defeated. She would accept it with grace.

What she hadn’t expected was to see General Hux at the summit, glaring about the room, his arms crossed, his back slouched.

“So good to see you, _Supreme Leader_ Phasma,” he said with a snarling curl of his lip.

She straightened her back, defensive. “I see you’re well, General Hux. Did you follow your childish infatuation to the Resistance?”

“Actually, he just likes my cooking,” interrupted a short woman with an authoritative tone.

Phasma instantly knew just who she was.

General Leia Organa patted his flushed cheek as she passed him, cooing, “Don’t you, Huxley?”

“Don’t call me that--”

Another familiar face interrupted him. “Shut up, _Huxley.”_

It seemed the old gang was back together again, Phasma supposed with a wry expression, staring at Kylo Ren. He no longer wore his dreary robes or intimidating mask, and though she had only seen his face once, there was no mistaking him, nor the lively woman beside him.

As a sign of respect for those that had defeated her, she removed her helmet, holding it to her hip. Phasma got right to the point.

“The First Order concedes to the Resistance and the New Republic. I have no desire to continue a war that has already been lost.”

General Organa looked impressed. “I see. That makes this very easy, then.”

Hardly, she thought.

Phasma heard General Hux grouse under his breath, “I’m certain that is the shortest amount of time anyone has spent as a Supreme Leader. Two fucking weeks.”

Mercifully, someone flung a pen at his head, and by the way Kylo Ren was suppressing a snicker, his better half was to blame. They were so affectionate it made her nauseous.

“Whatever programming has been used on the Stormtroopers will be wiped. As for you, your officers, and General Hux, the courts will decide your fates.”

Phasma decided it was more than reasonable.

She sighed. “Very well.”

If she got the chance, she was going to ask Kylo Ren what he had done to get out of capital punishment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hux is so fun to write. Also, momma!Leia will kick ur ass. Don't test her.
> 
> Thanks, as always, for the comments/kudos/general love. It's been a wild ride.


	23. Shave the Beard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey refuses to discuss the third stipulation. Hux grows a beard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I lied. This isn't the last chapter. Shout out to Stiletto Ren, for giving me ideas.
> 
> Also. There is a little bit of NSFW at the beginning. Just a little.

“So,” Kylo started.

Rey’s response was a muffled moan, her face buried in a pillow. She turned towards him with a small glare, her lips pulled into a pout. She was tired, and not in the mood for conversations.

“We killed Snoke,” he said slowly, pausing until she nodded at him, “And the First Order is pretty much finished--”

Despite her tiredness, despite the sore muscles, she shot up. “What are you trying to say?”

Rey didn’t really need to ask, she already could sense where this was going. He cringed up at her, hesitating. Still, he wasn’t going to back off so easily.

“Have you thought about the last stipulation?”

She pulled a face at him, her tone flat. “It’s impossible for me to not think about it.”

That should have been enough to change the subject, for him to let her settle back into bed and into his arms, at least for a few more minutes of sleep. It seemed, however, that he wasn’t going to take a hint. As she lowered herself again, and he covered her with their bedding, he nudged his nose into her loose hair.

“When do you think--”

With a low growl, she slapped her hand over his mouth. “I’m going to stop you right there. We’re not talking about this right now.”

_We’re going to need to talk about it eventually, Rey,_ his voice chimed in her head.

She propped herself up on her elbows. _Not right now, we don’t. We’ll talk about it when I’m ready._

He latched onto her last statement. _Okay, when are you going to be ready, then?_

_You’re ridiculous,_ she snarled back. _If you’re so desperate to have kids, maybe you should get pregnant. Have fun with that one._

He laughed under her hand, before loudly sucking the rise of her palm into his mouth, grinning at the obnoxious sound. Rey was certain it had been intentional.

“I’m not joking,” she grumbled, pulling her hand away and standing. Rey wiped his saliva off onto her hip. “If you want kids now, you’re going to have to figure out how to get knocked up, because I’m not doing it.”

She headed into the refresher in an attempt to end the conversation. She had already told him that she would want a family eventually, but she needed time. Rey was young, and she wasn’t convinced she was old enough to teach any child about a galaxy she knew almost nothing about. She stared at her reflection, admiring the peppering of kiss marks that stretched across her bare chest.

For a moment, she thumbed at the implant in her upper arm, the one she had gotten at seventeen. The one that would remain effective for at least another two years, unless she had it removed.

That was out of the question.

She shook out her tangled hair, forcing herself to smile into the mirror. There was no way she was going to get more rest, so despite the earliness, she turned on the hot water to the shower. Kylo stepped in to join her without a word. Rey was annoyed, she wasn’t in the mood for whatever attentions he planned to rain down on her, but before she could complain, he was wrapping his arms around her, resting his chin to the crown of her head.

“You realize,” he commented after a moment, “that it is completely impossible for me to get pregnant.”

She shoved him away, but snickered at his serious expression. He guided her to the tiled wall, and she was distracted by the sensation of cold against her back for just long enough for him to kneel before her. His lips skewed against her thigh--he was smirking, rather pleased with himself.

She sighed, instinctively moving her legs apart to offer him more room, and his large hand reached between them, long fingers grazing against her center. He angled her hips slightly as his mouth inched closer to her sex, and she pulled his wet hair from his face, shaking her head with a smile.

“You can’t honestly think that eating me out will change my mind.”

He laughed out loud, before stroking her with his tongue once. “It was worth a shot. It’s not liking I’m trying to avoid being executed, or anything--”

She rolled her hips towards his mouth, effectively shutting him up.

* * *

Hux was not particularly surprised when he was sentenced to death. In fact, he expressed his utter lack of surprise to Phasma with a thick lathering of sarcasm. Apparently, even a general and a lowly captain-turned-supreme leader did not have enough status to get their own prison cells. Meanwhile, Kylo Ren--a well known murderer--was off somewhere, sucking face with his scavenger rat, and Hux was certain that enraged him more than his own impending execution.

If he had been supreme leader, he would have at least had the sense to negotiate for his own life, and he reminded Phasma of this at every chance he got. They were both no better than prisoners now, however, and absolved of rank, she was a very different woman. There was no changing her gruffness, but she certainly spoke her mind when he challenged her.

Hux would have been amused by her snark, if it were not for the implication that she had been questioning his military decisions for years. Considering the cell they both now sat in, he supposed she had earned the right.

Kylo Ren visited once, and with the sole purpose of gloating. For a solid minute, he had laughed at his unshaven face. Apparently he had quite the copper beard growing in, and this entertained him to no end.

At last, Phasma was the one who broke up his laughter, exceedingly irritated. “Kylo Ren, did you have a purpose in coming here besides laughing at _Huxley?”_

Hux’s scowl deepened. She was calling him that exclusively, knowing full well how much he hated it. Perhaps because of how much he hated it. _General Huxley_ didn’t instill the same amount of fear, and she wanted to be sure he knew it.

“Not really,” he commented, leaning casually against the cell wall. “I’m shocked he hasn’t found a way to wiggle out of execution yet. I was curious what you two had up your sleeves.”

Hux glared up at him from his rock-hard bunk. Oh, how he missed his sprawling quarters.

“How did you wiggle out of execution?” Hux bit back with a venomous tone.

He watched Kylo Ren shrug, the motion astonishingly easy. The man that stood before him now was very different than the one who had commanded the Finalizer beside him. Hux barely recognized this Kylo Ren.

“Well, it helps to have inside connections,” he answered, combing back a few loose curls from falling into his eyes. “I had information, but that doesn’t help you now. The First Order doesn’t exist anymore, so whatever intelligence you have on them is useless. Really though, I had something I could offer that you probably never could.”

Hux leaned forward at that. He would grasp at almost anything, if it meant exile instead. “I’m much more capable than you will ever know, Kylo Ren. I don’t appreciate being underestimated by anyone, least of all--”

He was interrupted by a short bark of laughter. “Oh, so you’re telling me you can most definitely pop out a flock of jedi-babies?”

Hux pursed his lips together. He wanted to mock Kylo Ren for being kept alive as a glorified breeder, but he was better off than Hux was, and he couldn’t laugh at that. For a moment, he stared at his knees, covered in an undignified grey of a prisoner’s garb. If intelligence on the First Order was no longer valuable, there had to be something he knew that had worth.

It was Phasma who came up with a solution first. “Huxley, the Stormtroopers.”

His tone was bland as he slowly droned, “What about the Stormtroopers?”

“They were taken at very young ages, between one and three years old.”

“What’s your point--”

She looks annoyed with him once more. “I’m sure the troopers would want to know where their families are, reconnect with them, if they could.”

The way Phasma spelled it out for him was condescending, and the very idea of helping a bunch of useless Stormtroopers made Hux cringe, even if it was for the sake of saving his own skin. Kylo Ren was staring at him expectantly when Hux looked up again. The asshole was on the verge of cackling at his expense. Hux wasn’t known for his good deeds, though Kylo Ren hardly was either.

He straightened his back, steeling his expression. “I want my uniform back, freshly laundered and pressed, a razor, and a private meeting with General Organa.”

Kylo Ren snorted. “Who do I look like to you, your maid?”

“Shut up,” Hux flared. “I’m going to do something _nice.”_

And the very notion made him want to squirm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so there should be one more chapter, and then maybe an epilogue. We'll see.


	24. Unwanted Surprises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rey and Kylo have an unexpected guest with the worst possible timing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, it's just this and then a little epilogue. I should be able to get that up tomorrow.
> 
> No, it's not the kind of surprise you're thinking of.

General Leia Organa had, when her grumbling son came to see her, agreed to meet with Huxley and Phasma. She knew he must have felt a bit conflicted--while he had turned from the First Order and all it stood for, he still knew these people--and Leia felt she would do what she could for him.

When she entered the conference room, Huxley was bickering with Phasma, his voice a knife as he hissed, “This time, you’ll let me do the talking. Who knows what sort of situation you’ll get us into.”

“No offense, Huxley, but I’m the one who came up with--”

Leia cleared her throat, and they both stiffened, as if they were children caught misbehaving by a parent.

“Ben tells me you’re finally trying to wriggle out of being executed,” she started calmly, pulling a chair out and seating herself across from the pair.

_“Wriggle_ isn’t a term I would use,” Huxley replied “It’s so...”

“Accurate?” Phasma supplied for him, her tone flat. He scowled at her from the corner of his eye. She was undeterred. “Am I correct in assuming, then, that your son has not told you what we wished to discuss?”

“No, he wouldn’t say,” Leia crossed her arms over her chest. “Though he seemed to think that whatever it is you have to offer is worth a less extreme sentence.”

Though she wasn’t going to tell them, Leia was not fond of the death penalty. It was a barbaric punishment, if anyone bothered to ask her, and despite the deaths they had caused as Captain and General of the First Order, she didn’t think murder could be paid for with more death. Better they find another way to atone for their sins.

Phasma’s lips stretched thin in a predatory smile. “I think it might.”

Leia regarded her with a stern glance-over. “I’m listening.”

* * *

He knew he had been putting it off for much too long. Obi-Wan was becoming annoyingly insistent. It was time he faced his grandson, now that he had turned from the dark side and finished the sith once more. An added bonus, he didn’t even have to teach the brat how to flirt, because according to Obi-Wan, little Ben had landed a girl mostly on his own.

Anakin knew how much his grandson adored him, and though he might have appreciated it in his youth, he was not looking forward to any hero worship.

At last, he centered himself, gathering his patience, and appeared before his grandson.

His grandson, who was buck naked, wrists tied to a bunk that was barely long enough for him to lie on without his feet hanging off the edge. A young woman, mercifully still half dressed, crouched over him, a hand around his cock, a pink mouth teasing his left nipple as she giggled.

Anakin couldn’t help himself. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”

Ben’s eyes were bleary, confused, when he turned to Anakin’s voice, but his flushed violent red at realizing they were not alone. The girl made a short screech, stumbling away from his grandson and covering her bound chest with both arms.

Anakin swore, Obi-Wan was somehow behind this. He wouldn’t have been so persistent that he visit Ben unless it gave him some sort of grief. Petty revenge seemed to be his long lasting habit over the past three decades, and just when Anakin thought it was over, here he was, being sent to see his grandson involved in some kind of kink play.

“Why?” Anakin asked at last. _“Why?”_

_Why_ would anyone make him see this? Anakin wants to scrub his eyes out of his head. Only, he can’t. Because he’s dead.

Ben was quietly uttering something to the girl.

“Rey--just,” she covered his crotch with a sheet, assuming that was the problem. “No, if you could just...my wrists--”

_“Oh!”_ she gasped, yanking the rope away with a sharp tug of the force, and Ben slumped down, sinking into the mountain of pillows that had been piled behind him.

Anakin feels his overwhelming desire to sink into those pillows and be smothered to death. The feeling is mutual. Only he's certain he can't die a second time. He paced the length of the room.

* * *

Kylo covered his face with both hands, horrified. “You’re Anakin Skywalker, my grandfather, aren’t you.”

It wasn’t a question. He already knew it to be true. Kylo’s luck was just bad enough for his grandfather to suddenly appear, as he had always wanted him to, while Rey had been working him into a complete mess.

Anakin’s answer was to the point. “Yup.”

He wanted to cry. He _did,_ a little bit. A few tears trailed down his already burning face, searing over his cheeks.

He looked between his fingers to see the ghostly figure furiously pacing.

The atmosphere of the room was dense and uncomfortable, until Rey, unable to keep herself silent any longer, burst at the seams with delirious laughter. Kylo dropped his hands to willfully glare at her. His current situation was in no way amusing, and he had little appreciation for being mocked.

She fell over, wheezing, clutching her sides. “This...is the most ridiculous thing that has ever happened to me.”

Kylo snorted, face breaking into a grin. Her laughter was infectious, and he wanted to hate it, but it was pointless to resist.

“More ridiculous than the time BeeBee-Ate heard you screaming and barged in to zap me on the ass?”

“That was the most ridiculous thing that happened to _you,”_ she snickered, nudging his side with her foot.

“No, I think the Wookie Legs incident was more ridiculous.”

His grandfather stopped marching back and forth, turning to them both. “You two really aren’t discreet at all, are you?”

Kylo bared his teeth in an impossibly wide smile. “No, not at all. In fact, we’re as indiscreet as possible.”

His grandfather exhaled then, scrambling his brown curls with hooked fingers. “Good for you, kid. Good for you.”

Even if Kylo had always pictured their fateful meeting very differently, he couldn’t help but to agree as he glanced over at Rey, a heaving, chuckling mass of limbs, her hair sticking to her warm and beaming face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just want to thank all the patient readers who stuck with this very silly fic to the end. You guys have been so much fun to talk to throughout this whole wild ride, and I'm almost sad it's ending.


	25. Epilogue: The Third Stipulation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> At last, Rey is forced to talk about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a little something so that you get an idea of what happens next. I'm sure you can all take a wild guess.

After a year of cleaning up after the First Order, the Resistance disbanded. There was no longer anything for them to resist, and so she and Kylo followed Luke to Corescant, when he decided to reopen the last Jedi temple. Though he often teased them, he had no real expectations for them to immediately start offering up new Skywalker brats for him to teach.

News spread of the reopening of the Jedi Temple, and when everything was in working order, Luke went on long trips, following rumors of force-sensitive children for him to instruct. With the threat gone, people with abilities began to creep out from the cracks, and appearing at the temple with little warning.

Before the throng of students started rolling through the front door, however, Kylo finally dropped the name he had given himself. He had known he couldn’t keep it forever, not if he was going to be a part of the new Jedi order, and Rey suspected the reason he had hesitated to take up his true name for so long was because of his father. He couldn’t be a _Solo,_ not after what he had done to his father.

Ben Skywalker, however, he could try to live with. The night he asked her to call him Ben, she had whispered it into his lips until her voice went hoarse, and she couldn’t possibly say it again.

Another full year later, and she graduated from Padawan to Knight, and he was given the title of Master. Though he kept a straight face in front of Master Luke and the group of younglings and Padawan, the moment she got him alone, he broke into tears. She laughed, holding him as he cried--neither of them thought they could be so happy.

Seven weeks after that, he was holding back her hair as she hurled into a potted plant. It turned into a series of potted plants and waste baskets and toilets, and they both sensed the cause, though she knew he was afraid to approach the subject.

“You made me forget when the implant expired,” she accused one night, as she rested in his arms, her head curled under his chin.

He chuckled. “I did nothing of the sort.”

He paused for a beat.

“We can talk about it now, right? Because not being able to has been killing me.”

She kissed his throat, smiling. “Yes, well, it looks like you don’t have to worry about being executed any more.”

He huffed. “Okay, but, we can talk--”

“Yes, Ben!” she laughed. “Talk for hours, if you must.”

He did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that's the end of that! This has been so much fun to work on over the past few months, and I'm so thankful that the reylo community has been as welcoming as it has. I'm not sure if I'll ever work on another crackfic, but definitely expect more reylo from me! Also, fyi, I take writing prompts on my tumblr, if that's something that interests anyone. ;)

**Author's Note:**

> Come chat with me about reylo on my tumblr account (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ pissbabysithlord !


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